Have I got rectal cancer?

[Toby2000]

People shouldn't be posting on here, who have absolutely no idea about HA, which is clear from their lack of understanding about this condition and their distorted black and white view of mental health issues. No, Toby isn't manipulative, and anyone who has experienced this level of anxiety will know it. Frustrating, yes lol I recognise ALL elements of his behaviour from his age, that I had myself.

Yeah I'm very happy to just ignore him in the future

[Scass]

Yep I know it does. It's a vicious cycle that's hard to escape unless you stop worrying about it altogether.

Yeah and I don't know to be honest. I view my health anxiety as a separate "thing" to Asperger's which I think just affects my social skills and makes me more introverted, HA just gives me another reason to be introverted on top of that

Haha I like that. Sometimes I'm able to distract myself but other times I must look like the personification of a rainy day walking on the streets because of my mood

One day someone will give you some advice and it will resonate and stick and you will start to move on. Mine was from my doctor pointing out that at least half the people in the waiting room had anxiety or mental health problems in some form and that you weren’t in your own. From then it was receiving a guided meditation on relaxation and then a book that told me about the physical effects of anxiety. That was in my early 20’s.

So the reason I continue to post on forums is because one day something that helped me might help someone else. We have all been there and we’ve all felt that no-one understands, and we’ve all sunk to personal lows.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[glittery]

FMP is actually a really kind person afaik, he is a cancer survivor himself so I am sure he knows about the health anxiety. I don't know what happened today but maybe he got a little frustrated. I know NMP is not the right place to get frustrated, and FMP should have been more patient.

But what coping mechanisms have you tried so far Toby? What is your future plan on handling this?

I am sure you will know from my recent posts that I do suffer from a similar issue, which is basically on and off bleeding. My anxiety tells me it is cancer, but I try to rationalize it and tell myself that it is probably either piles or a fissure. I do not even get as many responses in my thread as you do.

I think all of you always paying so much attention to Toby's thread, replying to him 24x7, and reassuring him isn't helping it either. He is relying a lot on your replies, and it has become an unhealthy coping mechanism in itself for him.

I know all of us are trying to help him here, but a person needs to help himself too.

Toby you really need to get your act together. I know your reply to this will be "but I have cancer and will die anyway, so what's the point of getting help?"

^ This sort of mindset is stopping you from seeking help for your anxiety, and this is the exact mindset that you need to fight. It has become a bad circle of you not wanting to seek help for your anxiety because you think you have cancer, and you think you have cancer because you have anxiety.

Have you booked an appointment for your anxiety yet? Why don't you try it for once, and lets see if the therapist can help you. Who knows you might realize then that your mindset is wrong.

Whats the harm in trying? Even if you die tomorrow, better try everything before you die.

[Carys]

You are right Scass, that is such a valid point, one day....and who knows what it will be and what it will take....that balance will be tipped. For each person that 'resonation' is different, and can come from anywhere, from anyone, or any of your own small life experiences, and you never know where it will come from.

[Carys]

Hiyer Glittery,

Toby is currently on the waiting list for therapy, and started medication a couple of months ago. He has taken those steps, but as this is an eversoooooo long thread you won't have seen that info lol. I honestly believe that Toby IS trying to help himself, but he is really struggling and there is no doubt that he could do more, He could and should be getting out and trying to do something in the community for starters! Its a tough game as you know Glittery, and sadly one you know yourself all too well. Anyway, I'm sure Toby can and will reply himself, but just thought I'd add something. No offence intended in my reply, I hope you are ok with me doing so?

he is a cancer survivor himself so I am sure he knows about the health anxiety.

Being a cancer survivor doesn't make anyone (especially if they repeatedly say they have never suffered from HA!) know about HA.

[Toby2000]

One day someone will give you some advice and it will resonate and stick and you will start to move on. Mine was from my doctor pointing out that at least half the people in the waiting room had anxiety or mental health problems in some form and that you weren’t in your own. From then it was receiving a guided meditation on relaxation and then a book that told me about the physical effects of anxiety. That was in my early 20’s.

So the reason I continue to post on forums is because one day something that helped me might help someone else. We have all been there and we’ve all felt that no-one understands, and we’ve all sunk to personal lows.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I try to help others too on the bowel issues section, ironically I'm good at being rational and explaining things rationally but not when it comes to reassuring myself

I did have a nice talk with the GP today, I'll post more about that in a bit, that stuck with me.

[Toby2000]

FMP is actually a really kind person afaik, he is a cancer survivor himself so I am sure he knows about the health anxiety. I don't know what happened today but maybe he got a little frustrated. I know NMP is not the right place to get frustrated, and FMP should have been more patient.

But what coping mechanisms have you tried so far Toby? What is your future plan on handling this?

I am sure you will know from my recent posts that I do suffer from a similar issue, which is basically on and off bleeding. My anxiety tells me it is cancer, but I try to rationalize it and tell myself that it is probably either piles or a fissure. I do not even get as many responses in my thread as you do.

I think all of you always paying so much attention to Toby's thread, replying to him 24x7, and reassuring him isn't helping it either. He is relying a lot on your replies, and it has become an unhealthy coping mechanism in itself for him.

I know all of us are trying to help him here, but a person needs to help himself too.

Toby you really need to get your act together. I know your reply to this will be "but I have cancer and will die anyway, so what's the point of getting help?"

^ This sort of mindset is stopping you from seeking help for your anxiety, and this is the exact mindset that you need to fight. It has become a bad circle of you not wanting to seek help for your anxiety because you think you have cancer, and you think you have cancer because you have anxiety.

Have you booked an appointment for your anxiety yet? Why don't you try it for once, and lets see if the therapist can help you. Who knows you might realize then that your mindset is wrong.

Whats the harm in trying? Even if you die tomorrow, better try everything before you die.

I have always tried to be nice to FMP but he isn't nice back, but I think the situation has been sorted now so I'm just gonna leave it there before I acknowledge him any further!

Yeah you're right I do rely too much on reassurance and this forum, I suppose that's bad but really it's a way of coping for me and I see it as a compromise for my mind since it's better than Googling, which is what I always get the urge to do.

I am starting therapy/CBT, I had the phone assessment, there's just a long waiting period for it.

I'll have another look at your thread, I've definitely read it a few times before

[Toby2000]

So I went to the GP...

It was initially just to renew my prescription but it was a new GP and she was REALLY nice, I told her about what happened and explained the past year of my symptoms

She said that if it was bowel cancer then my stool would be a much darker color and since it's been mostly blood on the paper/outside of my stool which suggests something very low down AND I've had my rectum and lower part of my sigmoid colon checked with nothing found but hemorrhoids, then it will definitely be hemorrhoids as the cause

That really reassured me, I even explained about the darker blood and she still didn't think it was anything to worry about.

I'm obviously still not completely reassured, however I feel like it's enough for me to calm down in the short term

She told me to make a list of all my symptoms and any questions and everything and to come back for an appointment on Tuesday so we can talk about it in depth

She really did care about my issues and took me seriously, although she obviously wasn't convinced about cancer, but she was just so nice and explained everything well

She also said that hemorrhoids can exist further up in the rectum which reassured me even more

[Carys]

Rightyho, good news, now.......its a wonderful day today, a great one to be alive and well......get outside do something!

[Scass]

Sounds like a great GP Toby, fabulous that she is going to talk to you again.
As Carys says, it’s a great day to be alive.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk