intrusive thoughts and anxiety

[absb41]

Hi all I've found great comfort in this site over the last few weeks and once again am here for reassurance.

I'm currently experiencing an acute episode of anxiety with intrusive thoughts almost all day until I sleep. I find at the moment these thoughts relate to harming others or harming myself. I know deep down I would never do such a thing but the thoughts seem so automatic that it scares me.

I am currently having them about almost everything I see e.g. knives particularly bad, hoover cord and anything really my mind distorts.

Added to this my husbands nana died last week and we are obviously talking about death and dying and my father in law saud he had to collect the death certificate and my mind immediately thought you'll have to get one for me. I really dont like thinking these things and I am doing so much to reduce it but it is hard.

I had a mental health assessment who determind surprise surprise it is anxiety and not depression and I'm on cipralex and have been now for 18 days. They also suggested going back to work as during the days I'm at home alone most of the time which I am aware just gives me more time toi dwell!!!!

I guess I'd like to know if anyone else has experienced the irrational thoughts to the extent I have? and how you got on with medication such as cipralex.

two good things happened today I slept all through last night without getting up once and today for a short period I had no intrusive thoughts.

Would welcome any info from anyone - thanks

[conker]

Hi there. Ive been suffering with this 'problem' for the past couple of months- exactly the same as you-fear of knives and fear that I will cause harm to someone- particularly someone I love. Ive been reading a couple of good books which I would highly recommend- Self Help for your Nerves and Essential help for your nerves both by Dr Claire Weekes. Ive also got the Anxiety and Phobia workbook which is very good- I feel more 'normal' knowing that this is a recognised condition and that Im not turning into a nutter. Ive had OCD- about security and locking the house up for years, so I suspect thats where its all come from. I do feel better than I did but I do have my moments. Reward yourself for a good nights sleep, but dont worry if you have a bad one. You may have a couple of minutes when you dont have the intrusive thoughts.. and these periods will get longer. The books are very good in telling you to let the thoughts come in and accept them rather than reacting and worrying about them. If you acknowledge them and let them pass then the body cant get worked up over them. Its difficult to think "Oh here comes another thought that I might stab someone" as its so upsetting and distressing, but if you accept it for what it is- just a thought then it wont have half the effect. Its just the way you are feeling now, and your brain is tired and fatigued. You could get your brain to think of all sorts of good things, its just that its focusing on this path of least resistance at the moment which produces adrenalin. Ive been at work throughout and whilst Ive had really rough times, I do feel that its been good as something else to concentrate on. Ive also been to see a Counsellor which has helped. Hope this helps- you are not alone!