Hello everyone,
Like to start by saying, I never in a million years thought I would be typing this. I have health anxiety and it is the toughest ordeal I have ever gone through. I'm a 34 year old single male, who for the last 29 years have been a non worry type of person, very active with many hobbies. Just an outdoor extremist. From Wakeboarding behind my wake boat in the summer, to snowboarding in the winter, and just a happy go lucky guy. Anxiety started for me when I hit 29. I went through a surprisingly to most verbal abusive relationship, I know surprising coming from a guy I guess. But It all ended and was on the right track able to focus on being me. I then for some odd reason developed I had something majorly wrong with me medically... I immediately became obsessed with internet searching what I thought were my symptoms... one to never go to the doctors cause I didnt believe in it. Well long story short I got myself all worked up thinking I had every disease, cancer, you name it, I was an expert on it and convinced I had numerous things at different times until tests were done, clearing absolutely eliminating any problems in bloodwork, scans, you name it. Still not accepting that what the doctors said was all good, Dr. Google said otherwise and he is my main doctor. Everyday since I've been 29 health anxiety has consumed my life, I sure wish I could feel normal again... I've been put on Anxiety medication, stuck with it for awhile but would go off of it cause I believed I was good. Well all good, until I would have a symptom show up and here I go spending all my time on my phone researching what I think I have and it opens up with all kinds of different possibilities.... mainly the worse. Then the panic sets in, no appetite, thinking of nothing but the worst, no energy, sleep, crying spells, cant focus on anything. My newest thing going on now? I developed all of a sudden a flat pink spot on my cheek, I ask ppl about it some are like good grief, really dude? Others say it's nothing, others say yeah I can kinda see it, but all I know is well I'm dying of skin cancer, and that's all I focus on. Well as I sit and debate should I call my primary physician tomorrow and schedule another appt.? This dude has got to be tired of seeing me. Knowing I was just in 2 weeks ago for my six month checkup, with bloodwork and normal physical. I found this forum while searching symptoms online. And I thought what the hell, I'll become a member and talk through this with people that maybe going through the same thing I am. I know this is lengthy and I have alot of time to myself being single and live a ways from my family. So I guess with writing this, I ask am I nuts? Is this going to continue? If anyone has any of this that I'm going through, what has worked for you and got your butt in gear to get energetic and clear your mind of this? Im just so sick and tired of all this anxiety and am super eager to rid of it somehow. Sorry for the long post and thanks in advance for taking time to read this, and I hope that my story relates to someone else that maybe going through the same thing.
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