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Thread: As good as it gets .

  1. #491
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    6,980

    Re: As good as it gets .

    Buster, it's your choice to go away or not. No one can tell you whether you should stay or go, especially with the situation of your mum.
    I'm afraid it comes to us all. It's not pretty by all means, but this is a situation out of your control.
    Your brother will no doubt be feeling the same, so you have each other for support. x

  2. #492
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    1,729

    Re: As good as it gets .

    I went away yesterday but sadly it turned out to be another bad decision, my mum passed away today before I could get back home and before my brother could get to the hospital, drove home the whole way in tears to be with him , it feels unreal like a bad dream but I know I won’t be waking up from it , life hurts , love hurts .

  3. #493
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    1,379

    Re: As good as it gets .

    Buster, I really am so sorry to hear this. There really aren't any words I can say that would make you feel better. However I do know how it feels to lose your Mum. Listen buddy, you were a good son to her and she would have known that. Remember all those happy times but now you will need your family. What an awful year this has become. A blokey hug from me...
    __________________
    'It was a wedding ring, destined to be found in a cheap hotel, lost in a kitchen sink, or thrown in a wishing well' - Marillion, Clutching at Straws, 1987

  4. #494
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    6,980

    Re: As good as it gets .

    Buster, sending you hugs too. As you know I lost my mum 3 years ago and also was away when it happened. Had a long drive, just like you.
    As if it was meant to be that way. x

  5. #495
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    2,863

    Re: As good as it gets .

    My condolences, Buster. Hang in there.
    __________________
    I'm still a work in progress.
    Currently working on: World Domination

  6. #496
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    1,729

    Re: As good as it gets .

    Thank you for the kind words , it’s been a long hard day , didn’t sleep much and kept breaking down it tears at random times , had a few family visitors and talked about better days when we were young , I’m in pieces but seriously worried about my brother mum was his world and he’s said he doesnt want to carry on , they were supposed to move this week and we’d already started but now it will have to go through probate before the house sale can be finalised, we have so many things to organise while grieving, I still can’t get my head around the idea she’s gone it just doesn’t feel real , my dogs have been a comfort and a good excuse to get out on what was a beautiful day under normal circumstances.
    Thanks guys / gals .

  7. #497
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    1,379

    Re: As good as it gets .

    You will get through this Buster, it won't seem real because something that has been permanent in your life has indeed gone. But with your family around you, all of you can derive strength from each other. In particular your brother, you need each other now. And yes dogs are brilliant aren't they, spend time with them. Take care mate.
    __________________
    'It was a wedding ring, destined to be found in a cheap hotel, lost in a kitchen sink, or thrown in a wishing well' - Marillion, Clutching at Straws, 1987

  8. #498
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    6,980

    Re: As good as it gets .

    Buster, with all that has to be done, you will surprisingly get through it and the people you deal with are incredibly nice making it as smooth as possible for you.
    Your emotions will take time to heal and you basically just have to do what you feel is right for you while you grieve.
    You have your brother to share and help each other.
    Just be kind to yourself, that is what your mum would want. xx

  9. #499
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    10,671

    Re: As good as it gets .

    I'm very sorry to hear this news, Buster. I hope your partner will be supportive and help you cope in the days and weeks ahead. There will be a lot to do and organise and it will be very hard but you will get through it somehow x

  10. #500
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    1,729

    Re: As good as it gets .

    This has turned into another nightmare , since we got back my partner has just been angry all the time about the holiday we’re missing out on , my brother keeps saying he wants to kill himself now mum has gone , he has a long term girlfriend but has always lived with mum so has a massive whole in his life to fill ,I’m constantly trying to convince him he has a life to live but it falls on deaf ears , they were moving house this week but now the sale can’t go ahead and the new rented house is ready but he has no money to pay , my aunty owns the new house and has been great and says he doesn’t have to pay until the probate is sorted but he didn’t want to move away from mums memories , my uncle has been bothering him about making a decision even though it’s non of his ****ing business , I can’t sleep for worrying he’ll be gone as well when I go round .
    Im going to sort the funeral today , partner is coming, she has been very helpful with that side but because she didn’t get on with mum she seems to be grieving more for the lost holiday .
    I keep breaking down when alone and I feel an incredible rage inside that I want to erupt and smash something up or just feel some physical pain to combat the emotional pain , I really don’t know how to deal with all this going on at once .
    Again thanks for your support.

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