Hi Buster, it's about time I dragged myself away from panicking over coronavirus and gave you a bit of support instead. Crikey your situation sounds like a nightmare and reminds me of how things were here in the not so distant past. Feeling like your house is not your own. I really think you bend over backwards to keep others happy at the expense of your own happiness. Trying to carry all the cares of your family on your own back really isn't fair on you, but often when someone is so selfless as yourself, that person ends up feeling as though other's well being is their responsibility. It isn't though, there is only so much you can do without slipping below the surface. You clearly do more than your fair share, people around you need to start giving back.

That might sound harsh and I know it isn't easy when your conscience gets the better of you. I should probably start taking my own advice, but you having those dark thoughts is concerning to me and no doubt to anyone else reading this thread who knows you. Please stay safe buddy and know you're not alone.