Quote Originally Posted by beatroon View Post
Hello there,

I'm so sorry to hear that things are difficult. I come on these boards because I too suffer from a variety of relationship-related OCDs and I wanted to reach out because, although it would be wrong of me to offer reassurance, I can offer solidarity in trying not to go down the doom spiral! I am a fellow OCDer and I recently read an interview with the author John Green which I found helpful. He said that the problem with the doom spiral is that it gets tighter and more corkscrewy as you go down it, so the trick is to disengage and 'tune out' if you can. If you like, you can think of it this way:

Option A: go down the spiral
Will this help me find the answers? Nope - thinking will get more and more stressful and decision-making problematic - I'll just get more anxious
Option B: refocus my attention and try to live 'as if' the problem were not a problem 'right now'
Will this help me find the answers? ...who knows? But at least I'll have had a fun time in my day-to-day life!

OCD can make you feel there is a problem to be solved right now, otherwise you're doomed and all is lost, and all of this is a vicious lie. It's only by disengaging from the battle that we disarm the beast. Easier said than done, of course, but all of that to say that we are rooting for you and hope you feel more peaceful soon.

B
Thank you for this. I've since gotten over this obsession and worked it out with my therapist. The only issue is it went back to my older obsessions about ruining my relationships, having feelings for my friend and not doing well in my relationship. I love John Green, his latest book is my favorite book. I understand he also suffers from OCD. I will try to keep out of the doom spiral, thank you.