Hello NMP Fam. It’s been a minute since I’ve been here. Well I have been going through a lot of stress so I’m hoping that it’s part of it. Like my car window got smashed, my husband is being threatened by someone who we did work for, my job is the worst and unfulfilling and I’ve even been mildly depressed. Like thoughts of why are we here what’s the point of just existing why can’t we get ahead without being knocked down how come I can’t just be freaking normal. And my diet has not been stellar. I haven’t had a good BM in like over a week and today I feel like it all has hit me. I’ve gone three times and it’s so uncomfy. The cramping and sweating and just not feeling good. I’ve had a lot of pizza, Mac and cheese, sweets like donuts and cookies and milk with them, tons of coffee, last night we had Buffalo Wild Wings and I had garlic Parmesan wings and fries. I’ve had cheese enchiladas and beens. Like just not great, clean food and I think it might’ve constipated me until my insides were like we literally can’t. But here I am freaking out that what if it’s the start of UC? Or IBD? Or I caught something? But it’s not diarreah really it’s just lots of poop....uncomfortable movements. I always get scared when I have those depressing thoughts that I’ll create something bad because I feel bad. I’m in therapy for this but my dad always told me growing up that if I think about something long enough it will happen and I always saw that as something to be afraid of since I have health worries. Can anyone try to rationalize this for me in a nice and kind way? I’ve had a hard few weeks and just need some kindness. Thank you
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