Paranoia about passing cold sores...interfering with intimacy with new partner?

[scaredpt]

Hi all. I have been having anxiety this time not about myself but about my new boyfriend (only 1.5 months together). I have gotten cold sores in the past, and have this huge fear of passing it to a partner. Every time before I see him I inspect my lips and I try to avoid kissing because I'm scared of passing one. The other day I saw my bf and then woke up the next morning with what I think is a cold sore (or it could be a pimple I just irritating by poking), and I'm terrified I ahve given him cold sores now, because it was most liekly there during the night when we were kissig. I told him and he appreciated me telling him but I can't get it out of my head that I might've ruined his life and I'm dirty. I'm worried it's going to cause me to pull away.

[nomorepanic]

Giving someone a cold sore is not going to ruin their life to be honest and I am sure he doesn't think that either.

[RadioGaGa]

Well said Nicola!

[scaredpt]

yeah but no one would like to get them, and i'm worried if he gets them from me he will blame me for them for our whole relationship. or break up with me.

[BlueIris]

Would you want to be with somebody who broke up with you over such a trivial thing?

[scaredpt]

well i could also pass them to him down there. but yeah i'd hope that it's something that worst case, we can work to together and possibly make us stronger through communication. he says his parents get them so for all i know he's gotten one when he was younger!

[BlueIris]

Exactly, he probably already has the virus.

[scaredpt]

he said he's never gotten cold sores but if your mom gets them there's probably a chance of exposure, even if asymptomatic

[nomorepanic]

I think you are worrying over nothing to be honest.

It is not a big deal and you don't even know that you have a cold sore.

[scaredpt]

I guess if I passed it to him "down there" tht would not be optimal. but yeah I think I think cold sores are terrible because of my health anxiety. but to most people they're just pesky annoyances.