Page 93 of 226 FirstFirst ... 43839192939495103143193 ... LastLast
Results 921 to 930 of 2252

Thread: Today’s headlines .........

  1. #921
    Join Date
    May 2021
    Posts
    2,736

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    I am all for compulsive wearing of party hats. The false nose will be a difficult as I already have a large nose. Perhaps having a big nose will class me as medically exempt?

  2. #922
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by Pain View Post
    Science To Save Xmas…

    Following successful limited trials using the recently collaboratively-developed Pffter/Spunktic/Astronomical-Pharma/Smyrnov C2H6O* vaccine, the government has ordered sufficient doses to immunise all adults in a bid to combat the deadly boring Omygod variant of the Morbid 21 virus. Compulsory vaccination will begin immediately and government boffin Dr Huw Jerfibs says “We’re confident Christmas can be saved from the ravages of this terrible misery.” The witty government slogan will be “Just Get Jabbed.” Additional measures will remain in place throughout what used to be known wryly as the festive season, with silly party hats and false noses being mandatory in all public places. Anyone found failing to comply will be incarcerated and forced to sit through forty hours of non-stop Only Fools And Horses repeats. Rumours that this compulsory vaccination will be required every three months for the unforseeable future have not been denied.

    * Side effects can include: uncontrollable and inappropriate laughter, inane grinning, lurching and staggering, compulsion to sing tunelessly, double vision, severe vomiting, lethargy, amnesia, being banned from driving etcetera etcetera.
    This really made me chuckle!

  3. #923
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by Catkins View Post
    I am all for compulsive wearing of party hats. The false nose will be a difficult as I already have a large nose. Perhaps having a big nose will class me as medically exempt?
    Or if one has a Concorde-shaped nose!

  4. #924
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by Pain View Post
    That’s good news, because it means you have natural immunity to the Omygod variant. Nevertheless, you’ll still need to be vaccinated….

    And don’t go turning up at a vaccination centre with a fake arm – they're wise to that one now: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-59524527 Apparently the bloke's name's Don Silicone (Italian pronunciation).
    Well FYI, I have been triple-jabbed since 23rd Nov, so there you go!

  5. #925
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    16,747

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by Pain View Post
    That’s good news, because it means you have natural immunity to the Omygod variant. Nevertheless, you’ll still need to be vaccinated….

    And don’t go turning up at a vaccination centre with a fake arm – they're wise to that one now: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-59524527 Apparently the bloke's name's Don Silicone (Italian pronunciation).
    Maybe he thought it would be humerus?

  6. #926
    Join Date
    May 2021
    Posts
    2,736

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by pulisa View Post
    Maybe he thought it would be humerus?
    🤣🤣

  7. #927
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Banning sales of tobacco products to minors in NZ has been discussed and debated on Sunday Morning Live on BBC 1 this morning, and people are already deriding such proposals, believing it's the nanny state going too far and such legislation won't be practicable to enforce, etc, even many of us Brits alone, despite it not really being our problem what the authorities in NZ choose to do in this particular instance.

    I've heard these same old feeble excuses trotted out time and time again here in this country alone, not only the smoking in vehicles with children present, but also England's refusal so far to give up domestic corporal punishment of children.

    Not only the 'never did previous generations any harm' hyperbole regarding both smoking around children and physically chastising them, but the other 'whataboutery' such as how will policing such legislation be practicable with not enough police officers, social workers, etc, plus what about the fact that we do plenty of other unhealthy things on a daily basis like eat fried breakfasts, consume alcohol, breathe in traffic exhaust fumes, etc, to deflect from the argument.

    But whether it's restrictions on underage sales of tobacco products in NZ, restrictions on smoking around children and domestic corporal punishment of them in this country, surely the vast majority of the populations would still obey said legislations, regardless of whether they actually agreed with them or not.

    But of course, we almost always seem to end up pussyfooting around the 'simpletons' and serial 'non-believers' of this world!
    Last edited by Lencoboy; 12-12-21 at 12:14.

  8. #928
    Join Date
    May 2021
    Posts
    2,736

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    I bought thermals, a down coat , waterproof everything and neoprene insulated wellies last year in anticipation of having to socialise outside through the winter. Then we were locked down.

  9. #929
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    The Lib Dems won yesterday's North Shropshire by-election with a significant landslide. A truly remarkable result for an area that has reportedly been a safe 'blue wall' constituency for over 200 years, but obviously no longer.

    Boris eat your heart out!

  10. #930
    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    6,054

    Re: Today’s headlines .........

    Quote Originally Posted by Pain View Post
    Bring Me Sunshine…

    A long-lost episode of Morecambe and Wise is set to be broadcast in colour for the first time on Christmas Day.'

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-59599741

    Gary Morecambe, 65, said the rediscovered episode represents "a golden era of television".

    Christmas was always made complete by Morecambe & Wise (and The Great Escape and The Guns Of Navarone) There was no streaming, DVDs or even VHS tape then, which meant programmes and films (which were actually worth watching, even in black and white) were eagerly awaited events. I’m not sure this episode needed to be colourised… I'm sure it’d be great with my just wearing rose-tinted specs!

    https://www.televisiontunes.com/Brin..._and_Wise.html Always makes me smile!
    Well I bet that will make a lot of the nostalgics happy on the Big Day and provide some kind of antidote to the oft-perceived 'crapness' of modern-day Christmas TV.

    But of course stuff like M & W hails from a time when and where there was very limited choice on the box all year round, let alone Christmas, but people tended to appreciate and make the best of all that was available, unlike today where not only we're spoilt for choice with tons of channels operating 24/7 (unlike just 3 channels back then with midnight closedown), but also seem to revel in slagging off a lot of today's TV programming, justified or not.

    Like I keep saying, less was more on TV, especially pre-90s era.

Page 93 of 226 FirstFirst ... 43839192939495103143193 ... LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. GAD as National Enquirer headlines
    By beatroon in forum General Anxiety / Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD)
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 12-03-17, 13:30
  2. New today!
    By nursebetty in forum Introduce Yourself
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 25-01-16, 18:23
  3. Replies: 9
    Last Post: 27-10-13, 00:02
  4. Off day today!
    By Yorkman in forum Citalopram / Celexa
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 25-09-11, 17:30
  5. New today & would appreciate some help
    By clearsky in forum Introduce Yourself
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 27-05-08, 18:16

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •