Thought I should introduce myself as have been a long time reader of the forums.

My name is Matt, I am 45 from the UK and divorced. I suffer from GAD, Depression and Panic Disorder.

I have always been a nervous person for as long as I can remember. I didn't identify as having anxiety or depression, but having been diagnosed, I look back at my early life and can relate many of my memories to being those of anxiety. I was always very introverted (painfully shy people would comment), and avoided many situations - often opting for flight rather than fight. I can now see that these small decisions over a long period have had a cumulative effect on my mental health and led me to where I am today.

When I was in my early teens I suffered from some of the same symptoms I have today (and recognise as anxiety related) and was tested by the doctors for labyrinthitis and cancer among other things. No definitive diagnosis was found and the symptoms gradually wore off, or I managed to live with them.

In 2007, I suffered a major panic attack at work and was diagnosed with panic disorder and anxiety. I was off work for a total of 9 months and eventually took voluntary redundancy. At the time I was prescribed propranolol for the physical symptoms of anxiety and citalopram for the mental effects of anxiety and depression. I also undertook a program of 6 months of CBT with a psychotherapist. The citalopram did not work for me, so I was switched to venlafaxine. All together, these controlled the symptoms to the point that I could go back to university and complete an undergraduate and masters degree. During my time at university, I would get breakthrough panic, but was able to manage.

Since leaving university and going into a new profession, I had almost total remission between 2011 and 2019. I was still the same old nervous and anxious me, but without the debilitating symptoms of panic that made it impossible to function.

During this period and until recently, I was self medicating with alcohol and codeine.

In February of this year, out of the blue I experienced another panic attack and the flood of anxiety returned with a vengeance. I'm not sure whether the venlafaxine has stopped working, or the alcohol and painkiller abuse has nullified the effect of the medication.

I went back to the doctor and the venlafaxine was upped from 75mg to 150mg. This had little to no effect, so having done lots of research, I asked if the doctor would prescribe me pregabalin as I had heard of many success stories about this drug. He was reluctant as it had just been schedule a class C drug and is subject to widespread abuse. I have only been on the pregabalin (2 x 50mg dose a day) for 2 days so far too early to tell if it's working. I have a review in two weeks to up the dose if there is no side effects (I believe 400-600mg is the effective dose for GAD). I also have a new course of CBT starting in May.

So right now I am off work, suffering from severe anxiety and panic and at the following medication: 80mg propranolol, 150mg venlafaxine, 100mg pregabalin. I also have started vaping CDB oil after reading many good reviews of this for anxiety.

Hopefully I will have better news soon, but until then I will participate on the forum as I can.