What can I do right now?

[travelgirl77]

I need therapy, I know that I do. I have been in a right state for the first four months of this year. This month alone I have gone from ovarian cancer to bone cancer, to pancreatic cancer to an impending heart attack back to pancreatic cancer right now again.

We are moving out of state in a month so I do not think I should start with a therapist right now, but all I can do is google pancreatic cancer symptoms to assess whether this bloating is it or whether my lack of eating is anxiety or pancan. I know I should not google, but even if I am not googling I am thinking about it. I am so upset right now and I just want some tools to tide me over until I can get in to see someone.

My husband is currently working in the location where we are moving so he is not here and it is just the kids and I until the end of the school year. I NEED to be able to function for them but all I can do is imagine getting the pancan diagnosis while we are in the middle of all of this upheaval. I keep thinking these are my lasts...last Easter, last Mother's Day, etc. Tell me what I can do right now.

[AMomentofClarity]

Have you considered medication?

[nomorepanic]

Try the HA workshops we recommend in the sticky posts

[Beachlady]

What you can do right now is STOP GOOGLING and stop catastrophizing. There are literally millions of physical problems we get that are totally benign. Millions. But somehow you’ve landed on several different cancers in one month? I think you know how nonsensical that is.

[jray23]

1. Stop Googling
2. Meditate.
3. Go for a walk/jog/run
4. Do something social (maybe it's taking your kids to something or seeing a friend)

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[ErinKC]

1. Stop Googling
2. Meditate.
3. Go for a walk/jog/run
4. Do something social (maybe it's taking your kids to something or seeing a friend)

Good suggestions. For me, the most important thing is getting out of my house and out of my head! It's so hard to deal with anxiety while also being a mom. But, the more you get out the better. I used to just bring my daughter to Target to walk around because if I was at home I'd sit there googling things instead of paying attention to her. Just talking to the barista at Starbucks or the check out person would help snap me out of my panic sometimes.

If you drink coffee, stop or switch to decaf. Eat healthy foods, drink lots of water, be active.

[travelgirl77]

Thank you for all of the advice. I have tried walking every morning and just getting out there. I had two doctor appointments last week..one for my well woman where I cried and then with my GP where I cried. Anyway my GP suggested that I go on effexor (sp) but I want to wait until I have another adult around in case I have any crazy side effects and I am alone here with the kids. She also scheduled some bloodwork and an ultrasound because of intermittent tummy pain. But every single day that I drive by the freestanding ER I want to pull in and have them do the ultrasound NOW. I do not want to wait two weeks in case this is pancan and it gets worse. I fear doubling over in tummy pain while alone with the kids. I feel every sensation. I am still eating ok and not losing weight. I have taken about 50 pictures of my eyes to look for jaundice but any twinge in my tummy or back has me spiraling again. It takes everything in me to not go to the ER for instant testing. I do not want to be a plague on the system especially for people who are in immediate distress which I am not. But, if my hyper-vigilance can catch PC early then I want to know now.

[AMomentofClarity]

my GP suggested that I go on effexor (sp) but I want to wait until I have another adult around in case I have any crazy side effects and I am alone here with the kids.

Just curious, was this suggested by your doctor or something you came with on your own?

[travelgirl77]

My doctor suggested the meds, but she said, "Take them when you are ready. Even if you fill it and it sits on the shelf..." She did ask that I schedule a follow-up in four weeks. I am doing the single parent thing right now as we are in a moving transition while my husband is already stationed in the state we are moving to. We have sold our home and are currently in a rental in a different neighborhood until the kids finish school. I really do not want any adverse medication effects while I am their sole support with no "known" neighbors around. Even dizziness would impact my ability to get them to school and I have to drive them due to our rental location.

[Hypomean]

If you can’t help but google. I would suggest you watch a video on YouTube with Dr. Oz. He did a segment on hypochondria and how when someone googles something like my hair hurts (silly I know) Dr. Google will tell you; you are dying of a tumor. It’s just not right. Your best bet to get the right diagnosis so just get seen by a doctor. Depending on your insurance maybe you qualify for an over the phone therapist. Hopefully they do offer it and if they don’t then hun until you move why not just go to the therapist? If it’s going to help you out why are you going to avoid it just cause you’ll be moving? Do it for your kids.