Stag do Nightmare - I don’t want to go.

[Humph]

Will do Darksky thank you! And thank you all so so much for the support!

[Humph]

Quick update - I’ve arranged to see my brother on Sunday. It’s the earliest he could see me as he’s working all weekend. Literally shaking like a leaf when texting him to arrange seeing him. I feel so guilty as he doesn’t have a clue up to now. I feel like such a sh*tty person. Now I just have to think how I’m going to word it.

[Midnight-mouse]

Quick update - I’ve arranged to see my brother on Sunday. It’s the earliest he could see me as he’s working all weekend. Literally shaking like a leaf when texting him to arrange seeing him. I feel so guilty as he doesn’t have a clue up to now. I feel like such a sh*tty person. Now I just have to think how I’m going to word it.

What I’ve found to be best is being very honest, explain how you’ve been feeling and the knock on effects it’s been having. Be open about our struggles really helps others understand. I hid it and made excuses for years and it got me absolutely nowhere.

You’re not a bad person for having limits, every one does. One person may find that their limits are in travelling and the situation you’ve been dreading, another might not be able to walk over a bridge, go swimming etc - we all have our limits and things that we fear. It’s just unfortunately when the person also has mental illnesses our fears can be varied, illogical (as is most fear mind you!) and extremely difficult to face but there’s never shame or guilt to be had than being honest when you’ve reached you limit.

Positive vibes,

Mouse


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[Humph]

Thanks mouse. I plan on being as honest as I can, even though I really find it difficult opening up anout my mental issues, even to my wife. But you’re right hiding things gets you nowhere. I’ve already been hiding it and look where that’s got me. I guess I feel like a bad person for leaving it ‘til the last minute to drop out instead of saying I wouldn’t be able to go when his mates were organising it in January. I just didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of people I don’t know by admitting my problem. Which is a bit ironic as i’ll be more embarrassed now when they realise I’m not there and start asking why.

Positive vibes back at you

[Midnight-mouse]

Thanks mouse. I plan on being as honest as I can, even though I really find it difficult opening up anout my mental issues, even to my wife. But you’re right hiding things gets you nowhere. I’ve already been hiding it and look where that’s got me. I guess I feel like a bad person for leaving it ‘til the last minute to drop out instead of saying I wouldn’t be able to go when his mates were organising it in January. I just didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of people I don’t know by admitting my problem. Which is a bit ironic as i’ll be more embarrassed now when they realise I’m not there and start asking why.

Positive vibes back at you

It’s difficult but I think that opening up and admitting how we are feeling with our illnesses is often the first step to accepting them in our lives and learning how best to deal with them in the long run, plus it’s always a benefit to have real life people on our side that understand what we’re facing. It helps us to move forwards, I’ve gained more progress in my battle while being honest for a short amount of time than I did in the years of hiding it.

If it helps take points from how you described it to us to help you talk with your brother, be open with him. I honestly think that everyone will understand much more, you wouldn’t be embarrassed about any other illness or physical injuries so I would try not to think that way about mental illnesses.




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[Humph]

Yeah you’re completely right. I need to practice what I preach as I always say mental illness is no different to physical illness, just wish everyone else thought the same. That’s a really good idea taking points from describing on here to talk to my brother. It’s always easier explaining things to strangers haha. I’m completely overwhelmed by the amount of support I’ve recieved too. Thank you

[Darksky]

Well even though we're all strangers, the crucial thing is, each and every one of us can identify with what you're saying. The fears, the symptoms, the dispair, we've all been there. We get it.

[Humph]

Well even though we're all strangers, the crucial thing is, each and every one of us can identify with what you're saying. The fears, the symptoms, the dispair, we've all been there. We get it.

And it’s just so nice that you’vr all taken the time out of your days to read my post and offer advice an support. Certainly doesn’t make you feel so alone with things!

[Darksky]

You're welcome and I hope you'll stay on the forum after this is over. There's always someone reaching out for help.

[Humph]

Without a doubt! More than happy to offer support and advice where I can to others who need it.