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Thread: Breast diagnosis

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
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    19,164

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    I'm truly sorry to hear of your wife's diagnosis. As a survivor, a diagnosis is extremely difficult to hear and presents challenges to both the patient and the caregiver. There are forums dedicated to support both the patient and caregiver and offer support both from a physical and psychological aspect. Since this is the real deal and not just a HA fear, I suggest both of you look into them together. Also, speak to the hospital and doctors about real life support counseling. I know in my battle, it proved to be invaluable for us. From what you said, it sounds like they caught it early and with today's medical advancements in treatment, you should be confident all will turn out well.

    Positive thoughts
    __________________
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  2. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    519

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    We have 3 grown up children 2 of which havent even contacted their mother to offer her support and I'm angry about this to the point i want to let my feelings known but I don't see the point in creating illwill. She doesn't go for the sympathy angle but a few words wouldn't hurt.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Posts
    668

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    Quote Originally Posted by kestral View Post
    We have 3 grown up children 2 of which havent even contacted their mother to offer her support and I'm angry about this to the point i want to let my feelings known but I don't see the point in creating illwill. She doesn't go for the sympathy angle but a few words wouldn't hurt.
    It could be that they are still processing the diagnosis themselves and arenít ready to talk about it or just donít know what to say. Everyone has different ways of working through these types of things.

    Wishing you and your family well,

    Positive vibes,

    Mouse


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  4. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    7,930

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    Even so, there's no excuse for not making contact. Even if it's just to say that they don't know what to say..

    But as you say, any angry reaction from you won't help the situation and they will get in touch soon. You're in the thick of it and understandably want support for your wife from your children.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    519

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    Both sons have spoken to me but not directly to their mother while our daughter has spoken to me and been around us without talking one on one with her mum, perhaps as you say they need time to deal with it.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    4,259

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    Are there already family divisions prior to this diagnosis ? You say you've spoken to the sons, how did they come across to you? You say your daughter hasn't spoken to her mother either directly, but has she been talking with you both about it ?

    I don't know if you've let looked into the links I gave on the first post, and suggestions of who to make contact with - but to be honest with you 'a diagnosis' seems to bring out those who are good at dealing with things and are able to support, and those who aren't. Its quite common to find that some friends or family members flake out given this information and don't know what to do or how to do it and some friends vanish. However, if you concentrate on those places where they DO provide support and are expert at helping then it will help you and your wife much more than concerning yourself about the people who don't.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    519

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    No family issues what so ever it's me fretting about it not my wife. Does all cancer removable from the breast involve surgery or is there other forms of treatment?

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    4,259

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    Well, then it sounds like they are just having difficulty dealing with it Kestral, see what time brings. How did they respond when you told them ?

    Every woman's diagnosis is slightly different - until I got thrown into the world of BC I thought it was kind of just one thing that everybody got and some people were more advanced than others. There are many different types, and an array of treatment for all those different types, taking into account size, stage, if any lymph nodes are involved and all the many intricate biopsy results (which I won't list here). Treatment plans are individual therefore and its hard to say what your wife's treatment plan might possibly be. Sometimes also, treatment plans change over the course of initial treatment. I personally had a lumpectomy (tumour removal with margins around it), then radiotherapy and hormone related medication; mine was the most 'common' type. I know some also who have needed chemotherapy first, or hormone therapy first to shrink the tumour. If you know a few details about the type of diagnosis I may be able to offer more (non-medical) thoughts lol I will say this though, surgery in some shape and form happens for nearly all women, everyone certainly that I have come across - the type of surgery is dependant on various factors, and some types are more 'invasive' than others. Modern surgery is aimed at 'breast conserving' nowadays.
    Last edited by Carys; 15-06-19 at 17:39.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    519

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    The area they identified they said was approximately 1mm in size so we are hoping it will be confined to that only.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    867

    Re: Breast diagnosis

    This is good news that it is so small, I'm assuming it was picked up on a mammogram, like my partners, sisters cancer. She had a lumpectomy and then radiotherapy (like Carys did), I don't know if she had hormone treatment as well. My partners sisters was low grade which was extra good, that was 5 years ago. Hope all goes well for your wife.

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