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Thread: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

  1. #31
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    Quote Originally Posted by pulisa View Post
    So the box of diazepam has become 6 tablets and no velafaxine script? Thank goodness for that. A very interesting approach from the lady GP including some very unprofessional comments about a colleague. Sounds as though she has issues herself.
    Yup pretty much. It's all good though. Only 3 more days and then I'll know where I stand.
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  2. #32
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    Quote Originally Posted by WiredIncorrectly View Post
    I picked up my script from pharmacy. Included 6 of the benzos and no other drugs. You couldn't make this up. She told me to quit sertraline last night and take the new ones today. Luckily I didn't quit them. I'm laughing at how funny this situation has become.
    As the guidance shows an immediate switch is one of the two recommended strategies. However I think being on a higher dose is where it gets complicated because it's either going to end us:

    a) drop Sertraline today, start building up from low dose Ven tomorrow. This is going to cause some level of withdrawal.
    b) drop Sertraline today, go in full monty at a matched Ven dose. That risks the problems of start up side effects on a drug your body may not be used to and if you go over 150mg there is the noradrenaline issue (although that may be less of an issue considering Sertraline is more active on this, however without checking the saturation levels how do we know they are both equal in terms of this neurotransmitter?)

    It comes with it's risks. Another way is the cross taper but again that's really quite similar to a) however you would be taking a reduced Sertraline dose which will be adding to the Serotonin effects. This could smooth things out. It's basically like balancing two jugs on the scales.
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  3. #33
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    Quote Originally Posted by MyNameIsTerry View Post
    As the guidance shows an immediate switch is one of the two recommended strategies. However I think being on a higher dose is where it gets complicated because it's either going to end us:

    a) drop Sertraline today, start building up from low dose Ven tomorrow. This is going to cause some level of withdrawal.
    b) drop Sertraline today, go in full monty at a matched Ven dose. That risks the problems of start up side effects on a drug your body may not be used to and if you go over 150mg there is the noradrenaline issue (although that may be less of an issue considering Sertraline is more active on this, however without checking the saturation levels how do we know they are both equal in terms of this neurotransmitter?)

    It comes with it's risks. Another way is the cross taper but again that's really quite similar to a) however you would be taking a reduced Sertraline dose which will be adding to the Serotonin effects. This could smooth things out. It's basically like balancing two jugs on the scales.
    But that's the thing Terry she didn't give them to me at all even though she said they would be at the pharmacy. The box of diazepam was ... 6! Nobody had informed me after the phone conversation that there would be changes to what we had discussed. A cock up somewhere no doubt.

    Damn insomnia too! Feel so sleepy but just can not sleep. Thank goodness for Youtube.
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  4. #34
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    I think you need to be properly assessed and only then should a decision be made about a change of meds. Particularly in view of the recent self-harming. Don't settle for a GP "suck it and see" approach? You need to see a consultant who is aware of the complexities of ASD and meds sensitivities.

    Good luck for Tuesday.

  5. #35
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    Quote Originally Posted by pulisa View Post
    I think you need to be properly assessed and only then should a decision be made about a change of meds. Particularly in view of the recent self-harming. Don't settle for a GP "suck it and see" approach? You need to see a consultant who is aware of the complexities of ASD and meds sensitivities.

    Good luck for Tuesday.
    I agree. Thank you for your advice Pulisa.
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  6. #36
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    I forgot to post something that I was meant to.

    Now that I've had this respite (and honestly it does feel like respite) I can look back to how I was feeling last week and what I was experiencing. I think the negative thoughts are more than thoughts. More like voices. Whenever I hear somebody talk about hearing voices I always imagine a psychopath wanting to kill people (stereotypical view portrayed my movies).

    On those meds for a few days now and I've had non of these thoughts/voices. Scares me to think if it happens again. But its like there is something that isn't a part of me telling me things. And it's constant sometimes. Like: You are waste of space and a nobody. Look at all the damage you cause and all the hurt. Your too old to do anything quit trying. Stop talking about ending it and doing **** all about it. Be a man. Hang yourself. You can do it now nobody is home. Try it. Tie the rope and pull it tight you'll see it doesn't hurt. You are nothing in this life.

    That's when I started practicing with the rope. And it was like that from when I woke to when I slept. Sometimes keeping me away. This is when I usually bash my head with my hands, or thrash about all over the place and sometimes punching the pillow to get some peace.

    But I just thought that was normal depression. When I told this to my brother this weekend he was quite worried ... and he has depression himself.

    Please tell me everyone who is depressed has this?
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  7. #37
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    They've been today.

    I still didn't feel like I could open up ffs! Anyway, they've put me on the venlafaxine with the hope of increasing to max dose. Literally what he said. Gave me 1 more month of diazepam and then they're switching me from those to antipsychotic medications.

    I have outpatient appointment and mental hospital in 3 months.
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  8. #38
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    How are you doing? Glad the crisis team finally came to see you, but I'm sorry you had a hard time telling them how you were really feeling. Please tell me you have some sort of follow up with them sooner than 3 months?! How are you getting on with the new meds?

    Hope you are doing ok x
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  9. #39
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dying_Swan View Post
    How are you doing? Glad the crisis team finally came to see you, but I'm sorry you had a hard time telling them how you were really feeling. Please tell me you have some sort of follow up with them sooner than 3 months?! How are you getting on with the new meds?

    Hope you are doing ok x
    No follow up sooner :(

    When the guy came he was with a lady who was taking notes. My partner had smoked some cannabis outside the house. She uses it as an alternative to pain medications. She has 2 fractured disks and finds it helps.

    Anyway, the lady sat in our living room and was practically acting like she was dying. Had to open windows and all sorts. She didn't even smoke in the house, she smoked while walking the dogs around the park away from the house. But because she could smell it on her my partner had to leave the house.

    After that drama she was ok and seemed understanding. But she said at the end "So shall we cancel the home treatment team and book appointment in 3 months". I was like wtf?! But I couldn't really speak up. My partner wasn't there. And she said "Do you think you need them?". I answered no, because tbh I was feeling awful and wanted them out of the house. But my partner didn't even get the chance to explain her side of it and what she sees.

    They told me to try not to take the diazepam unless needed. I tried, it ended badly. I specifically told them I DO NOT WANT THESE MEDS BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN I STOP.

    It's like talking to brick walls. The actual doctor guy almost refused to enter because we had 2 dogs, who were in their crate with the door locked at the time.

    I'm feeling good. But that's only because of the diazepam. By no means fixed, but just don't have to deal with the mental torture. I best start counting down the days to when that mental torture will return.
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  10. #40
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    Re: [Trigger Warning] Meds don't work. Still depressed.

    What I've learned about myself recently though is I need a purpose. If I have a purpose, and something to wake up for, that's when I'm at my best. A 9-5 is not my purpose. And managing my own business is not really my purpose either. But, I did have a purpose early in the year that kept me on track. My uncle employed me to design his website and do his search engine optimization to generate customers from his business area from Google.

    If anyone wants to see the site I built you can view it here: https://bit.ly/32rgFBW ... built from scratch, and I do all his search engine optimization. I done all the write ups too. It's not finished as I have other sections of the site to build out and fill with content but it's getting there.

    I really felt like I had purpose doing this. My uncle offered to pay me £200 a month and a commission on sales through the site. But I only got 2 payments in 6 months and I was doing a lot of writing for him. Many periods I lost focus and drive. I wasn't seeing any reward. I think he was hoping to instantly start getting calls and business to be able to pay me. He doesn't understand for a brand new website it takes time. Especially if he's not willing to put his hand in his pocket.

    He gets traffic from Google, and calls. I've got all that monitored via Google My Business and analytics. So I know he's had calls.

    He paid me yesterday, the money went straight out on bills. But he still owes me from months and I just wish he'd employ me properly, pay me properly and let me do my thing. I enjoy helping people, but it sucks when they just expect you to do it because you're family. I'd charge a real customer £1000 a month to manage their SEO completely.
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