A wedding, a neck lump, and backsliding

[CatLady1]

Hi all. I haven't been on here much lately, as my health anxiety is less acute these days, and the combination of Sertraline and therapy has done wonders for me.

I recently (two weeks ago) got my earlobes pierced again. They aren't infected, as I've been following all the aftercare instructions, but they *are* a bit irritated and leaking lymph fluid (which I understand is normal). However, a lymph node immediately under my left ear has swollen up, and been palpable and hard for at least a week now.

I'm doing a reasonably good job of not going into an anxiety spiral - even though fear of lymphoma was the thing that prompted my GP to prescribe Sertraline back in November. I know that nodes are meant to react. This feels large, compared to its 'twin' on the right side of my neck, but it's not so large that there's a visible swelling in my neck.

Has anyone with experience of piercings or tattoos found that their lymph nodes swell up in the aftermath? Even in the absence of any infection or pain (my earlobes are just a bit itchy and, er, crusty, though I had swelling and redness for a few days after the piercing). I'm battling the urge to catastrophise, so other perspectives would be helpful.

[Fishmanpa]

I see the rabbit hole you're looking into there Catlady and I also see self checking behaviors and thought patterns drawing you closer to the edge. You know full well you're fine and this is a normal reaction to the piercing. You don't need reassurance. This is just the dragon trying to lure you in. You can push back. You've done it before.

Positive thoughts

[CatLady1]

Thank you

I see the rabbit hole you're looking into there Catlady and I also see self checking behaviors and thought patterns drawing you closer to the edge. You know full well you're fine and this is a normal reaction to the piercing. You don't need reassurance. This is just the dragon trying to lure you in. You can push back. You've done it before.

Positive thoughts

[.Poppy.]

It's normal. My ears took forever to heal after I got them pierced and even now if I sleep on them funny they'll hurt and occasionally a lymph node will come up. It's just your body doing what it's supposed to do.

[CatLady1]

I posted about a week ago, concerning a slightly swollen lymph node which seemed to have enlarged after a recent ear piercing. I figured I'd more or less got on top of that, and I didn't have the panicked spiral that would have accompanied it this time last year.

I've been doing SO WELL on the HA front - my GP put me on Sertraline in November, and it's made such a difference. I was even able to stop attending therapy a couple of months ago, and my therapist agreed that I'd made great progress and was ready to end it. While I'm still more vigilant than I probably need to be, I haven't gone into full 'I am dying' mode since February.

Today, I noticed what feels like another lump on my neck, on the opposite side to the previous swollen node. This is slightly further back - sort of behind and below my ear, rather than the point where my jaw ends and earlobe begins. It feels big, like a hard-ish grape, although not so swollen that I can 'see' it without touching it. I presume it's new, although of course there's a chance that I've had it for a while and only noticed it now.

I am trying so hard not to spiral, and I *know* that lymph nodes are pretty much the classic HA worry. I could deal with the earlier swollen node, because I'd just had an ear piercing which was irritated and weeping, so it was easy for me to connect those and wave the anxiety away. But I don't understand this lump - I don't even know if it's actually a lymph node or something else, but the same spot on the opposite side of my neck doesn't feel enlarged. My ears have healed apart from a bit of dry skin. I don't have any kind of cold or sinus problem. Just a few minor insect bites, and a bruise on my leg from tripping over a table a couple of days ago. (I do get occasional night sweats, but I know that's a side effect of Sertraline. No weight loss as far as I know.)

I am getting married next month, and obviously that means a lot of work and a degree of anxiety over the organisational aspect. I know that in the past, my HA has flared up when some kind of big life event is happening. Ordinarily I'd go to the GP about the lump, but I am reluctant to do that now, partly because excessive GP visits were a part of my HA reassurance-seeking behaviour, and partly because, if they do think it warrants investigation, I'll be spending all the time around my wedding worrying about any tests/results.

Kindly requesting advice, hand-holding, small kittens, the usual...

[busterrufus]

Have you any spots or bites on your head or neck? These can cause the swollen lymph node.

[CatLady1]

One teeny insect bite on my earlobe (on the same side) a few days ago, but it's gone down already.

Have you any spots or bites on your head or neck? These can cause the swollen lymph node.

[nomorepanic]

Hi

This is just a courtesy reply to let you know that your thread was merged with another of your threads.

Please when posting on similar topics add it onto your previous post rather than starting a new one.

It is nothing personal it is just to make it easier for people to follow your story and to give you advice as a whole.

[CatLady1]

Just posting a quick update: I managed to ride out this panic spiral. I had to see my GP for a review of my sertraline prescription (which, I can't stress enough, is doing wonders for me), and when asked if I'd had any continuing anxiety, I was upfront and said that I'd been worrying about the lymph node, but that I *knew* it was anxiety rather than an actual health problem, and that my judgement was skewed. The GP very kindly checked my neck, and confirmed that there was indeed nothing to worry about, which is fine by me.

So in hindsight, I feel like I have made progress with the way in which I deal with HA. Yes, my mind went to the dark place, and yes, I did engage in some self-checking and reassurance behaviours. BUT, I managed to contain the panic and get on with my job and my life (rather than breaking down in tears, refusing to eat, and so on); and I kept what I'd learned in therapy about catastrophising and control at the front of my mind.

I thought I'd share this, not just as a courtesy to the people on this forum who provide such great advice, but also because I think we all have to remember that the battle against HA can be a continual one. You might start to deal with it in a better way, but still not be completely cured of it. That doesn't mean that you've failed, or that you're weak and stupid. Keep going. It's worth it.

[SarahNah]

Thanks for the update- it's amazing how far we can come! It sounds like you're doing you're best x

Oh! And congratulations on the wedding x