Chills at night?

[UserName20]

Hello, thank you for responding. I would like to look into therapy. They were willing to refer me somewhere but I am still on my parent’s insurance since I’m 19 and when the dr mentioned therapy my Dad just almost looked like he was shaking his head. I just am so terrified something is wrong. I don’t know what else could be wrong or what other tests they could run. I just want to stop worrying and start living. 😔 I know this new medicine will take a month or so to kick in. But I’m terrified this ain’t just my anxiety and that something physical is going on. I can’t think of anything else. I sleep fine but even in the middle of the night my chest feels fine but I am hyper focused on it with every twist and turn. Earlier today I was scared because my left pinkie felt asleep for an hour or two. I’m taking tums. I’m taking the Prilosec. I stopped the medicine they said could be causing heart burn but I’ve been off of it for 5 days now. My heart rate and blood pressure have been fine as I’ve been taking it st home. Just so frustrating. The cardiac nurse at urgent care told me a week ago yesterday that my heart sounded perfectly Normal. So if it isn’t my heart now I’m worried about cancer or something

[Fishmanpa]

My daughter was not much older than you when she came to me and told me about her anxiety and depression. I, along with her mother, made sure she got help. She's been on meds and in therapy since and despite a bump in the road now and again, she's doing great. I find it a shame that many parents don't recognize mental health issues. Please take a look at this and find out what help is available to you in your area. Perhaps an honest sit down with your parents, showing them what you've been posting online would be in order as well. You need all the real life support you can get.

Positive thoughts

[UserName20]

Thank you Fishmanpa, your responses have always been very helpful to me. I want to say I was around 14 or 15 when I first had begun to get really scared about symptoms. I still remember... I had felt a weird bubbling sensation in my chest. I googled and oh boy, heart failure came up. My parents had told me at the time I was being silly, my mother told me maybe it was asthma. Looking back it didn't make a lot of sense, but then all of a sudden over the next few weeks I started feeling like I couldn't breathe properly. Then that turned into a lung cancer fear. I remember i barely even enjoyed that family vacation, i felt like I had an undiagnosed death sentence. Since then it is like symptom after symptom, disease after disease. I wasn't aware that I had anxiety. I didn't know health anxiety was a thing. I had opened up to a school counselor about feeling anxious and depressed. I even stopped going to school and got sent to a behavioral school. I was not a bad kid, I was a goofy two shoe and i never got in trouble but suddenly i was thrown in with a bunch of kids who had gotten expelled and having to be patted down before They could step into the school. The school called my parents and told them that they should consider getting me evaluated, especially since my sister struggles with anixety. I still remember what my parents told them. I remember my parents telling me to "stop pretending to be like my sister." Now, my parents are loving, I think they just think that I am "tough and normal" compared to my sister.

I am so glad that I have at least taken the first steps at least with medicine. That night I went to ER in a panic its like something just changed in me. I didn't care what my parents thought, I knew my anxiety was out of control. Underneath all of this panic, there is a part of me that knows I need help. Im paying all of the copay for my medication, I am trying to be as independent as I can be but while being on my parents' insurance I still have to go through them. I just want these weird chest symptoms to go away. I want the medicine to kick in, I want to go back to living a life that I am happy to live. I feel like I haven't been properly living the past few years.

I am so thankful for all of the support I have had online along the way. Since my family doesn't understand as much as I would like I am glad I found others who understand on here. This site has really helped me realize that I am not alone in this.

[Fishmanpa]

I am so thankful for all of the support I have had online along the way. Since my family doesn't understand as much as I would like I am glad I found others who understand on here. This site has really helped me realize that I am not alone in this.

While there's a definite benefit to knowing you're not alone in your thoughts and struggles, and it's cathartic to be able to express your thoughts and fears, you run the risk of it becoming a replacement for real life help and efforts. What you don't want is this becoming a reassurance seeking thing and food for the dragon. I mentioned 'serial posters' on another thread and I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking about. Despite your anxiety and fears, you possess a very rational side and I often see it in your replies. That's why I reply and encourage you. IMO, you possess the inner strength and fortitude to put the dragon in his place. The last thing you want is to see you here years from now still struggling with the same issues.

Meds are a funny thing. You're just getting started on them and that's bound to ramp up your anxiety a bit. My daughter went through several meds through the years. Some worked, some didn't. Some worked for a while then quit on her. She had to go through the ramp ups, the cross tapering and all the side effects that went along with that. I spent many an hour on the phone with her in tears feeling helpless but I told her the same things I'm telling you. Tough it out, even if it's an hour at a time. Push yourself to do the things you enjoy, find distractions, eat right, read about anxiety and learn how it affects you and why. Look into therapy. There are resources in every state and they'll work with you. There are often groups that get together with fellow suffers and that interaction can be very beneficial. When my wife was in recovery from encephalitis, I found a local group that were composed of people who suffered brain trauma and their caregivers. Their experiences and support helped me greatly and helped me help her.

Recovery, whether it's a mental or physical illness is a process. It's often one step forward and two back but eventually it becomes two forward and one back and it gets better from there. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and you'll see the goal much more clearly.

Positive thoughts

[UserName20]

I have been reading your response a few times daily the last couple of days and it has really helped me! I have been doing everything I possibly can to keep myself busy. Like you said i just have to push through it! There have been some downsides as can be expected. Yesterday I got the bill from the ER and yikes. I’m starting to think I’m going to have to put my college on break for this semester or so to handle all of my medical things. That was a really rough realization. I completely broke down, more than I ever have before and honestly I was starting to scare myself. I was so mad that they sent me home and didn’t even find this undiagnosed heart/cancer/ that I can “feel” that I have. I cried to my boyfriend and he told me “there is nothing with you. We already know that.” And I completely lost it, telling him there is and that nobody is listening to me. It was a really frightening mood that I was in. And then after getting some tears out I got back up and brushed myself off the best I could.

I am very pleased to say that the burning sensations in my arms and my chest are gone. It must have been the other medicine causing it. I am still feeling tightness in my chest. Not pain, just tightness right where my heart is. It scares me so bad. But I know if I went back to the dr my family would be even angrier at me. I just hope nothing is going on and that there’s no undetected heart problems or cancer.

It’s going to be a big battle for sure but I know somehow I’ll get through it.

[UserName20]

Im trying so hard to remain positive but nothing is working. I just keep getting this random tightness pain right above my heart at random times. I feel all alone in this at this point. The hospital wasn’t able to find anything wrong but all they did was an EKG and blood tests. Now I owe the hospital a ton of money. ( I know I shouldn’t have went to the ER that night but I was panicked.) I saw my normal doctor that Tuesday a couple of days after and at that time I wasn’t really having chest pains. Then the antidepressant they started me on caused burning pains across my arms and heart burn. I stopped that medication one week ago today. The burning went away but now I’m left with a tightness where my heart is. Everyone keeps telling me anxiety. I feel like I’m at my ends wits. I ruined my chances of taking my college classes this semester as I am now in debt from that ER visit. I am starting to feel so down about everything. I just fear there is a cancer or a heart condition. I’m ruining my own life. My mind is wondering how much longer I have of Being alive

[UserName20]

I have taken my blood pressure several times after work today. My blood pressure seems okay. But my pulse is going from 90’s to 103 ish?

[UserName20]

I really honestly can’t do this anymore. I feel like I need to start planning my own funeral. This feeling/tightness in my heart is not going away. I’m fearing the absolute worst how couldn’t I? I wake up in the middle of the night and I feel the tightness. I immediately take my pulse and can just feel my heart stomping away. I don’t know what this could be but I wouldn’t wish this fear on anyone. I feel like I’m having another panic attack yet I’m too afraid to take the pills they gave me for panic attacks on top of my other antidepressant. I don’t know what’s happening I’m losing control

[BlueIris]

I'm sorry you're having such a rough time, it sounds awful. Constantly measuring your vital signs won't help, though.

[UserName20]

Thank you for responding. I know I need to stop constantly checking my vitals. My blood pressure is fine. My pulse has been around 90 for the most part today which terrifies me. I wouldn’t wish this worrying on anyone. I’m starting to feel so depressed like I already have a death sentence even though docs have told me my heart is fine. I still feel like they need to run more tests besides an EKG, listening to it, and blood tests. I’m scared I have cancer or something. But my family will think I’m nuts if I go back to the dr tomorrow. I know my anxiety is playing a part in this right now.