How to change overthinking.

[Kendra]

Hi,
As many of you know this overthinking of everything is part of anxiety but I just wondered how you all deal with it? For me the thought pings in my head then I dwell on it until eventually I either totally avoid the situation or try it and panic which then leads me to want to avoid it again. I'm on 30mg of cit, done CBT, counseling, been hypnotized and now feel like I am running out of things to try and help me.
Sometimes I can be ok and push through but then I dwell on it for days and make myself anxious all over again!!
I am so sick of feeling like this. Any ideas would be truly gratefully recieved. Xx

[ankietyjoe]

Meditation deals with this directly and effectively. It's not an overnight cure, more of an ongoing re-training of the brain.

[Elen]

I use a breathing technique to interrupt the thoughts, the more you use it the more effective it becomes.

[Kendra]

I've been on meds a while. I have been reading up on the breathing and relaxation it takes me ages to relax. Probably need more practise. Thanks for your responses x

[ankietyjoe]

Meditation and relaxation techniques do take a long time to practice and perfect. They are slow burn cures, but they ARE cures. Think of it as something you have to practice for weeks/months rather than minutes and then give up.

[DustingMyselfOff]

Thanks for the reminder, Joe. I'm still working on my meditation practices and have been slacking the past few days. Even though I have got to be somewhere in an hour, I'm going to take 15 minutes right now and DO IT!
Sue

[ankietyjoe]

It can be 60 seconds if that's all the time you have. Once it becomes habitual and part of your life, you can do it for any amount of time, anywhere. Even in a life (or elevator in Freedomunits©)....

[DustingMyselfOff]

I know you've explained it before, as have several other people, but I still am not clear on how to know if I'm on the right track with meditating. I know there are several different types with several different practices and end results, but what is it I'm trying to accomplish? I originally thought it was to totally clear my mind, but I would have to be brain dead for that to happen. the last time I saw my hypnotherapist he told me to "meditate on . . . "whatever subject we were talking about at the time. I thought I wasn't supposed to think while I was meditating so how can it have a subject matter?

When I listen to binaural beats, I get totally relaxed and even when the music stops I like to stay in silence for a while, but is that meditation? How will I know when I'm doing it right, and how will I know if what I'm doing now isn't just a waste of time if I'm doing it wrong? There probably is no "wrong" way as long as we keep trying, but I can't handle one more book that tells me to focus on my breathing. There is nothing exciting or audible or noticeable enough about my breathing to keep me focused on it for more than 30 seconds.
Sue

[ankietyjoe]

I know you've explained it before, as have several other people, but I still am not clear on how to know if I'm on the right track with meditating. I know there are several different types with several different practices and end results, but what is it I'm trying to accomplish? I originally thought it was to totally clear my mind, but I would have to be brain dead for that to happen. the last time I saw my hypnotherapist he told me to "meditate on . . . "whatever subject we were talking about at the time. I thought I wasn't supposed to think while I was meditating so how can it have a subject matter?

When I listen to binaural beats, I get totally relaxed and even when the music stops I like to stay in silence for a while, but is that meditation? How will I know when I'm doing it right, and how will I know if what I'm doing now isn't just a waste of time if I'm doing it wrong? There probably is no "wrong" way as long as we keep trying, but I can't handle one more book that tells me to focus on my breathing. There is nothing exciting or audible or noticeable enough about my breathing to keep me focused on it for more than 30 seconds.
Sue

I'll try and do this in quickbit fashion!!

1 - Meditation isn't about emptying the mind. That's not possible, unless you're dead.

2 - Your hypnotherapist is really asking you to be mindful, not meditative. He/She may have their wires crossed.

3 - Listening to binaural beats isn't meditation, unless you decide to make it meditation......although any activity that relaxes you is hugely beneficial in the short and long term.

4 - Don't worry about success, this is corporate Nancy talking. Meditation is about just doing it, not winning it.

5 - Meditation is (and this is the big one) just the practice of re-focusing your attention on the subject of your meditation. That's it.

So, going back to this issue you have with focusing on breathing. You say that there's nothing exciting, noticeable or audible? You could put your hand on your stomach and focus on the movement. You could focus on the sensation of air passing through your nostrils, or even count during in breaths and out breaths...slowly. Or, you could focus on something completely different. Your meditation focus could even be on the binaural beats you listen to, although I would recommend perhaps finding another aural source of meditation as you're already getting benefit from what you're doing in terms of relaxation.

During the meditation, all you have to do is slowly re-focus your mind on the subject matter each time your mind wanders (which it will, repeatedly, probably hundreds of times). There's no need to mentally 'FFS I can't do this', as success is irrelevant. Remember, this is just practice. The point, is the re-focusing. It's the non judgemental re-focusing that is the 'magic' of meditation. I wouldn't even worry about knowing if or when it's working, because the response to meditation is a fundamental human response, but it's misjudged in modern times because it isn't an instant response that we're used to. The analogy I usually use is losing weight. If you spent 10-15 years becoming overweight, you would never expect to lose all that weight in a month no matter how hard you tried. Most people take a year or so? Some people take even longer...if they keep repeating that habits that got them there in the first place.

[BlueIris]

May I recommend downloading the Headspace app? As well as the pay components it has a really good free introduction to meditation that provides a very easy, stress free entry point. I tend to worry a lot about getting things wrong, and I found it immensely reassuring.