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Thread: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
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    1,608

    Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    I'm in a really odd place today.
    Yesterday I learnt that a 48 year old friend of mine that I met online in 1999 had passed away.
    I would say that even though we had only ever communicated through technology and had not met face to face we were close.
    He was a lovely soul and we would skype occasionally, he would reach out when he saw that the Black Dog was at my door and I would reach out in similar circumstances.
    I guess I'm really unsure how to process this.
    I don't know his famiy but I want to tell them what a top bloke Kenny was.

    We shared an interest in Audio drama, Doctor Who and Radio. He was always someone who was constructive in his appreciation and I think I really warmed to him because he was genuinely kind.
    Its really odd that he is gone. It was sudden and unsignposted.

    Don't know if people here have been through the same thing?
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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    2,657

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Oh, Mezzanine!

    Of course you're hurting! You've just lost somebody you care about. I think that for us people with mental health issues, online friends are even more important than for people who maybe find it easier to make social connections in the outside world.

    Let yourself mourn your friend, who sounds like a truly wonderful guy.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    1,146

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Your feelings are perfectly normal Mezzanine. Although there was no face to face relationship, he was still a friend and somebody you cared for. I don't think it would be strange if you was to reach out to a family member and offer your condolences. If he was a known member of a community it can be helpful for family to know that too.

    Hope you're ok. Take it easy <3
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2008
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    1,437

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    This is so sad. A friend is a friend. I’m sorry for your loss.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
    Posts
    1,726

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Sorry for your loss, I hope you find a way to pass a message to his family. I’m sure they’ll appreciate it.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    8,268

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    I think your feelings are entirely normal in these very sad circumstances. Kenny was a true friend to you regardless of whether you had contact online or face to face. I'm sure he helped you more than many people you know in "real life" because he had empathy and understanding.

    His family will appreciate your tribute to him. He was obviously a very kind and genuine man and I'm very sorry for your loss.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    1,170

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    A friend is a friend. Even if your interaction was online and through video chatting, that's still a friend. That's still a missing person from your life that you will not get back. You have every right to grieve, and his family would like to hear from you. My guess is that they won't be surprised that he was a good friend to you, and had no problems making friends with someone long distance.

    I am sorry for your loss.
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  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
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    409

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Any person you can call a friend is a friend, distance or how you speak doesn't matter. I'm very sorry for your loss x

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    1,608

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Thanks everyone
    Really appreciate the Input
    I am Sad and feel the Loss

    I have normalised it to some degree and have reached out to family to feedback to them how great the chap was

    Its just something I had never really come across before
    __________________
    Dudley Moore: Do you feel you've learnt by your mistakes here?
    Peter Cook: I think I have, yes, and I think I can probably repeat them almost perfectly.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    22,198

    Re: Losing an eFriend ( Bereavement Online )

    Tony,

    Really sorry to hear this. Like others have said, a friend is a friend.

    Is it so different from friends who move away? The old pen pals? People you work with on a remote basis but spend a lot of time with? I don't think it is.

    Technology may have given us new opportunities to meet people but it's not so different from the ways of the past and you can be closer to someone on the other side of the world than someone in the next street.

    His family will greatly appreciate the kind words. You know you have us if you need us. Give yourself time, dedicate a poem to him or write about it on your blog spot if you want to get it out and talk about how much you appreciated him in your life.
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