Coping by staying busy, a bit too much maybe

[lofwyr]

Lately my life is a bit of a mess.

I have GAD, but the majority of my anxiety has been health related in the past. But lately it seems to be just more generalized. I have a couple decades worth of CBT under the belt, which normally works well, but not always.

I was doing well for some time, able to stay focused and productive. But I am under stressors from every angle. I have genuine health issues of a serious nature to monitor. I have health issues on an anxious nature which probably aren't real. I have issues in my professional life and my personal life, both of which need some work. I have a hard time having faith in my medical specialists, even though they have given me no reason to doubt them. In short, my life is a bit of a mess at the moment, and the anxiety is starting to peak.

To that end, I find myself doing everything I can to stay busy and out of my head. In writing, that sounds great. But in practice, it means getting up too early because I cannot sleep and cleaning the house. It means taking on not one, but three remodeling projects around the house. It means going grocery shopping at 11 at night. It means looking for anything and everything to do to stay busy. I suppose it does ease the anxiety a bit, but I am burning the candle at both ends. It is like I have simply forgotten completely how to let go of problems and relax. Taking a hot bath just leaves me antsy and worked up when I am done. Tea doesn't calm, and I cannot relax enough to pay attention to a book or TV show.

What works for you guys, when it comes to finding something to do to actually help calm you, instead of just frantically doing things until you drop from exhaustion?

[ankietyjoe]

I can't believe this, but i'm going to talk about meditation.......again.

The unease you feel sitting in a bath is exactly what meditation is good for. It teaches you to sit with your mind and all the sensations you feel, and not judge them.

I think you're right to be concerned about your current coping mechanism as eventually it might backfire, so I would strongly recommend starting to meditate.

Be aware that meditation is not about relaxation, it is about awareness and acceptance. It's a tool to rewire the brain away from catastrophising everything that you feel, and being ok with sitting still and feeling a bit weird.

[DustingMyselfOff]

If Joe hadn't suggested meditation, I would have. I spent decades keeping myself frantically busy and distracted 18 hours a day and collapsing in exhaustion the other 6. It does backfire and then you have no choice but to deal with it in a better way. Do yourself a favor and don't exhaust yourself physically - then you'll just have a double whammy to deal with. Running isn't the answer.
Sue

[lofwyr]

Thanks guys. The funny thing is I used to meditate a lot. I guess it just slipped past me somehow. I will renew my efforts at adding it to my day again.

[ankietyjoe]

You could also start introducing being mindful into the current coping mechanisms.

For example, your evening grocery shop is probably less busy than a daytime one. I used to (and sometimes still do) use that time to walk around the supermarket aisles and 'smell the roses'. Just slowly taking a good look at what the shop sells and perusing things slowly and deliberately.

[MyNameIsTerry]

You could also start introducing being mindful into the current coping mechanisms.

For example, your evening grocery shop is probably less busy than a daytime one. I used to (and sometimes still do) use that time to walk around the supermarket aisles and 'smell the roses'. Just slowly taking a good look at what the shop sells and perusing things slowly and deliberately.

Yep, meditation is often seen as sitting on a mat in silence for a bit and I think this often adds an obstacle to people like us who are struggling doing just that. Whilst it's important to learn this way too because it will teach you about your breathing and sitting with your thoughts it's only one strand, a foundation. You progress onto applying it in what you do.

As Joe says you can do it in the supermarket. You employ your senses to touch, taste, feel, listen, etc. Rather than rushing around stressing your body you stand there looking at something having a think about how you feel. You don't glance and run, you actually notice something.

Just stand at a wall. Feel the texture of the brick and how it changes as you move your hands over it. How does it make you feel? What comes to mind as you do it? Breathe in and notice what you feel and how things change. But it's not about questioning it all and what it means, merely you just do what we did before we all grew up in a stressed out world.

Stroke your dog/cat. Feel the changing texture of the fur. Feel the heat. Feel the heartbeat and their breathing. Again thoughts will come to you . Just go with it.

[AntsyVee]

Yoga is great too, and it works well with meditation.

[lofwyr]

Love the ideas guys, and thanks for the reminder to, well, be mindful and focus on meditating. As to Yoga, my wife is getting into it, could be something great to do together. I have a serious medical issue that messes with planking, and any push up style position (it could kill me) so I will have to find a work around for somethings. But will definitely see what I can do.

[AntsyVee]

I have some hard times with yoga too, due to back issues, so I do “curvy yoga” for overweight people. It has an online guide. Just look into different types. A relative of mine likes that yoga were you use those cloths that hang from the ceiling.