So I've been feeling on very high alert, jumping at phone calls or doorbells etc. I googled this, and ofcourse this sort of thing was associated with paranoia/delusions and schizophrenia. And I'm not silly, I know schizophrenic people dont realise they are developing schizophrenia but I just feel so on edge.

I am scared I am developing it :(

I keep getting scary intrusive thoughts/images, and i was pulling up my mattress yesterday and at the corner of my eye i saw something and it looked like a head with black hair being pulled up but I saw it was my scarf and I laughed it off because it was a silly thing to think and I realised it was down to my heightened state of anxiety, but now I'm scared it means something worse. What if I am developing schizophrenia? Also today at the corner of my eye I randomly saw a flash of light, and momentarily I was scared it was a ghost and ofc it was nothing.
I read a story about a man who got so delusional and paranoid that he attempted to kill his wife one night and that just scared me SO MUCH.

I'm going doctors tomorrow, I am going to tell the doctor about how much anxiety I have and ask for medication. I am terrified the medication he will prescribe me will make me really paranoid because I've read that can be a symptom, which really scares me, especially after all the stories I ended up reading on paranoia :(

Any words of advice will be helpful right now, I feel like I'm about to have a panic attack:(