Life...with moles as the topping

[nicole97]

Life has really been handing crud to me lately and it's overwhelming. Between money issues, car trouble, furnace problems, general weight issues plus issues with my husband's health. Then there is my dad who is dying (actually dying, on hospice care) of esophageal cancer and I am devastated. He's my hero.

To top it off, had my usual 6 month check at the derm. Last couple have actually been fine for once (rare). This time, 3 moles taken off (one I asked to be removed, but TWO she was concerned about - and one of those is on my scalp). I'm trying not to worry about them but with everything else going on, it's so hard to keep that anxiety under control. I really just want to curl up and cry.

[lofwyr]

I am the king of moles. I have so many, and I hate them so much. And this is the year when the wheels came off with basal cell and actinic keratosis galore. I went from one fine skin check a year to suddenly having spots and things start showing up all over. Nothing suspicious for melanoma yet, at least, but covered in suspicious squamous cell, pre cancer, and basal cell type lesions that are all being monitored or biopsied.

The thing is, you have plenty of real anxiety. Allow yourself to feel that. Your husband and father's situations are understandable, don't try to have "no" anxiety about that. Allow it. It is natural. Moles do not equal cancer, and skin cancer does not equal death. I am on a support group that is filled with people dealing with skin cancer vitrually as a chronic condition. It is not fun, and it is at times scary, but the worst case scenario is you have a vigilant dermatologist who caught something early and focus on your father.

[Quinn1]

Well I must be the Queen of Moles.

Nicole

[nicole97]

Thank you both of you! Having had melanoma come up once before is why any new findings terrify me. I think having my father dying and my husband having issues also fuels this so much because I Just think about my children, especially my youngest. I was doing pretty well last night but I just woke up in a cold sweat, just full of anxiety. Ugh I hate this! If it had been moles that I was only concerned with, I would be a bit calmer, but when the Derm is concerned, that is what scares me. Every time. She said she is absolutely not worried and is confident they will just come back as atypical but she can’t really know with the results (and she knows how scared I get).

[nicole97]

Lofwyr- I am sorry you have had to deal with the bccs! While those are the “best” ones (is there really such a thing?), I know they can be numerous and a pain. :-(

[nicole97]

Ugh. I am so, so nervous. ☹️

[bin tenn]

Sorry you're so nervous, Nicole. And I'm also sorry to hear about your father. My dad also died from esophageal cancer, and it's no walk in the park. I hope things go as smoothly as they can, all things considered. And I hope you get news about the mole removals as well.

[nicole97]

Thanks Bin! Sorry about your dad. You’re right, absolutely not a walk in the park and I don’t feel like I’m handling it very well at all.

[nicole97]

Now I feel like I’m taking everything I have had the last few days and assuming I have skin cancer that spread (like lower back pain or a cough). This is such a terrible thing to have (HA).

[nicole97]

And the anxiety just increases by the minute. Gah!