Massive panic....Again Tefal pans

[Pamplemousse]

That seems like a massive price to pay for an irrational fear, with no basis at all in reality. Surely this is not worth losing your life partner for ?

What makes you think that your Mum and Dad's house doesn't have something that will be your next contamination problem ?

Wow. Vix, would you seriously risk losing your partner rather than address this non-issue?

I'd say "get an asbestos survey done, despite the cost" but I'm more concerned you'd just move onto another contamination issue afterwards and it'd be money wasted.

Some of us here had no choice in losing our partners: you do.

[Dying_Swan]

Hi Vix.
Im sorry you're having such a bad time right now. Would it be worth talking to your partner and explaining that you realise it's irrational but you're struggling to manage your fear and waiting for some help? It's difficult for others to understand but I think people can be more patient if they realise you're seeking support. I also think these situations can be a "cover" for the real anxiety, perhaps unconsciously, and it can be worth trying to figure out what the real, underlying fear is.

As far as I understand it, asbestos presents no risk if it's left alone. A vast number of houses have artex ceilings. I had one ripped down a while ago due to a massive crack which had been there for years. It was an unholy mess and not something I'd have done unless absolutely necessary, but if you're that worried you could have a builder or surveyor give it the once over. That would be reassurance-seeking though, so it would be a good idea to get some support with your anxiety too.

[Sparky16]

Thank you and thank you Blueiris thatÂ’s so kind of you, just struggling to get myself to do anything like that seeing as I think I Â’ve hurt my whole family though. I donÂ’t feel like I deserve to do something I enjoy.
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That is not true, Vix, that's just your anxiety trying to trick you. Your family is fine. They just want you back and feeling better!

[Carys]

How goes it Vix ?

[vix118]

Not great, been signed off work. Still at my mum and dads.


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[BlueIris]

Sorry to hear that, Vix. Are your kids with you?

[vix118]

I’ve just a son and yes he’s here with me. I went to the house yesterday to wean myself in. I want to be back in for Christmas. I just don’t know how to do it without panicking.


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[vix118]

Just went back to the house again and felt like I couldn’t breathe. I don’t know how to do this.


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[Carys]

....but you can breathe ! There is nothing that is different from breathing outside the home to inside the home, its only your anxiety making you think you can't. YOu need to stop giving in to the fear. You are now following the classic avoidance route, as you have labelled your home as a threat. I think its a mistake to say 'back in for Christmas' that is absolutely weeks away - weeks during which time you will be building this up even further in your mind.

[Pamplemousse]

There are pollutants outside the home far more dangerous than the ones you think are in your home: diesel particulates, NOx emissions, people burning inappropriate materials in their wood-burning stoves... the list goes on.