It IS a huge responsibility Pulisa, but I have no doubts about your capabilities, especially knowing what you have been through knowing you for the last five years plus. It never seems to stop does it? The challenges, the worries, the pain. And you can't help but wonder why some people go through life plain sailing with not a worry in the world.
It's a challenge Pulisa. Just look at it like that. You are good at challenges, despite what you say about not being as strong as people think you are.
Don't bottle up your emotions, let them out. If you are angry, then go and thump a pillow or let out a long Grrrrrrrr and if you need to have a moment of a few tears, just watch 'The Pride of Britain' on this week.
What I'm trying to say is although your attention is on your son and your daughter as well, take time to deal with your emotions too. If you feel you are alone then pop on this thread to pick up a hug or two or lean on our shoulders.
Without the support on here, I wouldn't achieve half of what I do. So be kind to yourself and allow others to help you x