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Thread: Last hurdle

  1. #81
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    24,667

    Re: Last hurdle

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahNah View Post
    Like tonight I went with my boyfriend and his family to a Christmas market- which I was dreading. All the people, the lights- just felt like a bad thing waiting to happen. Yet I manged to stick my ground, I felt uncomfortable loads and stuff but I stuck it out and managed to enjoy myself somewhat!
    There you go! That's more than a little step IMO....AND... you're getting to see and experience something quite wonderful and unique. My son works for the airlines and travels the world. Last Christmas he went to Germany and Austria for Christmas and visited the Christmas street markets. The pictures were amazing and he had an awesome time. He then went to the UK and Ireland for New Years.

    Keep up the good work!

    Positive thoughts
    __________________
    "Eat. Drink. Enjoy the work you do. Be thankful for the blessings God gives you in this life. Live, love and seek out the things that bring your heart joy. The rest is meaningless... Like chasing the wind." King Solomon

    The best help is the help you give yourself! http://cbt4panic.org/

  2. #82
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    4,889

    Re: Last hurdle

    Quote Originally Posted by SarahNah View Post
    Yeah I think I'm learning more about cause and effect when it comes to my anixety and how it links to my body. Like if I stand up there's a chance it's gonna jump up by a few beats or if I start walking faster or moving faster it's going to get higher.
    This is an important observation.

    Something I found that I had to do was make this happen for several months. I would go out for walks and just observe what my heart was doing, re-learning that cause and effect. The odd paradox was that the more I observed my heart reacting to activity, the less I noticed it. I eventually got to the point where I was back in the gym on the treadmill and then doing 30-45 minutes of moderately heavy weight training. My heart rate would get up to close to 150bpm during heavier sets and it was fine. Even less bothersome when I did it at home, so you can get used to it again.

    You're definitely on the right track, but don't feel like you have to recover in a week just because you've seen behind the curtain. There are hundreds of conscious and subconscious panic reactions ingrained in your thought patterns that need to be slowly unlearned, so when they do occur just bring yourself back to the moment and remind yourself you're still on the journey.

  3. #83
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    636

    Re: Last hurdle

    Quote Originally Posted by Fishmanpa View Post
    There you go! That's more than a little step IMO....AND... you're getting to see and experience something quite wonderful and unique. My son works for the airlines and travels the world. Last Christmas he went to Germany and Austria for Christmas and visited the Christmas street markets. The pictures were amazing and he had an awesome time. He then went to the UK and Ireland for New Years.

    Keep up the good work!

    Positive thoughts
    It's nice to see he visited my new home and my old home country! (Ireland is truly dear to me.....not that I'm picking favorites...) I hope he had a lovely time on his travels here during the Christmas times! I was over in the states over year for Christmas season and it is rather different to home! I can still remember buying popcorn somewhere and then offering me...actually melted butter to out on top. My sixteen years old mind, couldn't believe what I was seeing!

    We went home today, I had one little wobble but I did it! I'm a little under the weather- so just gonna dry alot of water and try to rest up before I have to go back to work on Sunday! I have to wear a facial mask as part of my work...and squeezing into it- wouldn't not recommend! Once again, thank you for the reply x

  4. #84
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    636

    Re: Last hurdle

    Quote Originally Posted by ankietyjoe View Post
    This is an important observation.

    Something I found that I had to do was make this happen for several months. I would go out for walks and just observe what my heart was doing, re-learning that cause and effect. The odd paradox was that the more I observed my heart reacting to activity, the less I noticed it. I eventually got to the point where I was back in the gym on the treadmill and then doing 30-45 minutes of moderately heavy weight training. My heart rate would get up to close to 150bpm during heavier sets and it was fine. Even less bothersome when I did it at home, so you can get used to it again.

    You're definitely on the right track, but don't feel like you have to recover in a week just because you've seen behind the curtain. There are hundreds of conscious and subconscious panic reactions ingrained in your thought patterns that need to be slowly unlearned, so when they do occur just bring yourself back to the moment and remind yourself you're still on the journey.
    Like I find before everytime I would stand up/move around I would have to take my pulse. Of course it would be high and I would freak- it was a circle of doom! Now I don't allow myself to take my pulse. Currently I only allow myself to do it twice in a day (if needs be) that's when I get up in the morning and just when I'm going to bed. I'm hoping eventually I won't need to do it at all and I'll just know all is fine! But comapred to how I used to take it 100's times of a day (wish I was joking) it's really being toned down.

    Like I've returned home with a nasty headcold and normally even little sickness like this would set everything off. Since feeling so tried/rundown would make me start to question my body all over again! but I picked up some meds and hope with rest, lots of water and maybe a alot of tissues. I'll be better in no time...but I guess it suits this time of year since I'm going to look like Rudolph by the end of this

    Thank you once again for your reply Joe x I defo have to remind myself that it's better to take little steps and make food progress then trying to rush everything and expect to much to quickly x

  5. #85
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    636

    Re: Last hurdle

    Like last night was rough, I had a massive panic attack. Like I had to sit with my head between my legs and work on breathing for a good 30 mintues as I couldn't come down from it- I think apart of it has been because I've been so sick since I got back but I'm trying to remind myself of cause and effect.

    Like my chest hurts so badly because I'm coughing up up the worst looking thing you've ever seen, my nose/head is in pain but there's also a lot of nasty stuff coming down there. Like I know I just a bad dose of some type of head cold/virus. Plus I feel dead- again there's alot of stuff up there.I haven't been sleeping well- because it's not been comfortable laying down so that's cause this exhausted feeling and feeling weak. Like it's all just part of having a cold of some type doesn't mean it's something horrible. There's a cause and effect for all of this.

    Yet I still manged to get some sleep, I had to go to work today to sign off on projects and we wear med masks as part of your uniform (I work in lab) so not that worried about passing things on as it's mainly paper work and I'll be alone but I'll try to get it done as quickly as possible. As I have tomorrow off and my therapist back in Ireland is calling me tomorrow- and I might be able to set up a therapist here soon also! Just waiting for a call back so fingers crossed!

  6. #86
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    636

    Re: Last hurdle

    So, the last weeks was alot of ups and downs. I've got another type of head-cold- so there's really no end to it during this time of year! Today been the worse, my ear been ringing alot and I can't walk around with feeling like I'm gonna faint. My heart rate has only really been bothering me again today, it's been up around 120-ish because I can feel it at times but it's not like the worse it's been! I'm going to take another nap and try to rest up for tomorrow! I have a few more packets of limsip to take- very thankful I brought them over! My Mam was right about me needing them

    Some good news this week- I've got a grant with my work! It means I can do so, so much more! I wasn't expecting it at all! It was such a lovely and surprising moment! I also booked my flights back to Ireland for Christmas....a good enough deal if I say so myself! Flights can be maaadd pricey this time of year. Even for all the worry about the heart rate today- on Wednesday I went for a jog. A full five minutes, I didn't go fast or far but I did it! I slowly built my way up and up to it. Once I'm more rested up, I'm planning to try and move more and more! I'm thinking of swimming again, I used to be such a water baby!

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