Various Health Fears

[MrLurcher]

We've had a massive shock and it's very upsetting. He had no obvious symptoms of illness, and didn't complain of anything - the leg swelling can be a symptom of Liver issues though.

He had no symptoms, wasn't physically ill. I've never heard of someone dying suddenly from a tumour rupturing. Seems very rare. Unreal.

I just can't get over that two brothers have been suffering from cancer at the same time, that's unheard of. It just seems like terrible bad luck.

My uncle's pancreatic cancer made me worry about myself, but this is off the scale now. Cancers are hereditary. I think I will have to get some screening for cancer mutations or whatever in the near future.

[pulisa]

Your dad's story is not your story.

Your uncle's story is not your story.

This is (currently) your story..


You have HA. Your dad's just died. It's going to majorly spike. You're not f*cked.

Please read this post again, Mr L. This is fact. Your HA will go into overdrive. It's a huge shock for everyone. They will need you to resist the urge to spiral.

[Catkins]

Both my mother-in-law and brother-in-law died of oesophageal cancer - when my b-I-l developed it 2 years after his mother died he had genetic testing to see if was hereditary for the sake of his children. It wasn't, it was a fluke.

It doesn't automatically mean that you are going to get cancer.

[Fishmanpa]

It doesn't automatically mean that you are going to get cancer.

Exactly. While the odds of cancer (even pancreatic cancer) being hereditary are incredibly slim at best, in light of the recent events, I'm afraid that will offer little solace :(

Mr L... this is an incredibly difficult time and one goes through a plethora of emotions when losing a parent or loved one. Take time to grieve. Allow yourself to go through the stages and don't set a timeline. I promise you, it does get easier over time. I lost my mother New Years Day 2017 (dementia and cancer) and I still have my moments now and again but overall, aside from just missing her, I've come to terms with it and you will too eventually. Look into grief counseling. I found it very helpful.

FMP

[MrLurcher]

I just can't believe my dad died suddenly from internal bleeding caused by undiagnosed cancer. It's just completely unheard of. Two brothers with two quite lethal forms of cancer at the same time. How unlucky is that? I just can't process it, at all.

This has made the grieving process even more difficult.

[Fishmanpa]

I just can't believe my dad died suddenly from internal bleeding caused by undiagnosed cancer. It's just completely unheard of. Two brothers with two quite lethal forms of cancer at the same time. How unlucky is that? I just can't process it, at all.

This has made the grieving process even more difficult.

Was it truly undiagnosed? Did he visit his doctor for the symptoms? Because if he did, that's another animal altogether.

The grieving process has barely started. You're in the first stage, bordering on the 2nd stage... again... it will take time.... sending...

Positive thoughts

[jojo2316]

I just can't believe my dad died suddenly from internal bleeding caused by undiagnosed cancer. It's just completely unheard of. Two brothers with two quite lethal forms of cancer at the same time. How unlucky is that? I just can't process it, at all.

This has made the grieving process even more difficult.

Even without this freakish coincidence it would feel unbelievable. You have lost your dad. That is too huge to take in right now. Let alone with your uncle too. I’m so sorry Mr L. This is going to take time

[pulisa]

You'll have a lot of questions going through your head and no answers yet..There will no doubt be some clarity in the days ahead though if the post mortem is challenged and I suppose that will be down to your Mum?

[MrLurcher]

Yes, it was truly undiagnosed. He hadn't been to the doctor for nearly a year. He had yearly blood tests because he was on two types of medication for bipolar. Nothing was picked up last year apart from being borderline t2 diabetes.

He had no obvious symptoms. He had been complaining of a slight pain in his right shoulder over the last few weeks, which he thought was likely muscular because he pulled something when watering flowers, and had been having an odd stitch pain in his lower abdomen on and off.

My mum doesn't want to challenge the post mortem and just wants to accept it and move on.

[pulisa]

Yes, it was truly undiagnosed. He hadn't been to the doctor for nearly a year. He had yearly blood tests because he was on two types of medication for bipolar. Nothing was picked up last year apart from being borderline t2 diabetes.

He had no obvious symptoms. He had been complaining of a slight pain in his right shoulder over the last few weeks, which he thought was likely muscular because he pulled something when watering flowers, and had been having an odd stitch pain in his lower abdomen on and off.

My mum doesn't want to challenge the post mortem and just wants to accept it and move on.

You have to respect her wishes. She's got enough to cope with as it is. Maybe in time she will feel she needs to know more but at the moment it must all seem completely unreal