Various Health Fears

[pulisa]

You are a parent with HA. You always leap to worst case scenario and are convinced that you are right. Do you think your partner would dismiss your fears if she thought your little girl really needed to see a doctor? Yes you've had some terrible losses to deal with but you can't pass your anxieties onto your children and your partner is trying to be rational and protect them from unnecessary trips to the GP.

[Fishmanpa]

On top of all that, my partner thinks it's maybe psychological about her not eating well, and that it's MY fault because I obsess with how much they eat, and fuss when they don't eat properly at dinner.

As I said and elaborated on many times here, I know first hand and from personal experience, what the mental illness of a parent and the consequences can do to a child.

FMP

[Catkins]

Just because she tested negative on a lateral flow it doesn't mean she hasn't got it. I know from experience.

But kids go through phases, both with eating and tiredness. Listen to your partner.

[MrLurcher]

I'm in a panic now. My mum suggested we check to see if she has any worms, because she remembers kids being off their food when she used to teach, and sometimes they had worms. Ours have had it twice before so that doesn't bother me.

However I'm not sure if I saw a tiny bit of blood at the end of her poo just now. She's been a bit constipated the past few days, but today was quite loose. I'm panicking a bit that she's got crohns disease or something. She said this morning her belly hurts so I'm in a proper mess.

She's on the smaller side for her age, and she's said before a few times that her belly hurts. And now she's not eating properly, she has a lot of Crohns symptoms.

Just give me a break life please. I can't cope with this any longer. I'm in such a state, I think I'm going to be sick.

[Scass]

Oook, I’m the last one to tell you not to panic about your child’s health because I’m me and I panic about all of my loved ones health.

However, someone above made an excellent point about how your partner would not ignore warning signs.

Is this child at school? Could it just be that now they are back at school they are more tired & eating better? If she’s not eating at all then yes, take her to the doctor.


When my daughter had worms I didn’t notice an appetite change, but she did wake in the middle of the night with itchy / red “parts” and I eventually saw a worm. It’s pretty disgusting but very easily treatable.


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[MrLurcher]

Oook, I’m the last one to tell you not to panic about your child’s health because I’m me and I panic about all of my loved ones health.

However, someone above made an excellent point about how your partner would not ignore warning signs.

Is this child at school? Could it just be that now they are back at school they are more tired & eating better? If she’s not eating at all then yes, take her to the doctor.


When my daughter had worms I didn’t notice an appetite change, but she did wake in the middle of the night with itchy / red “parts” and I eventually saw a worm. It’s pretty disgusting but very easily treatable.


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Thanks for the reply Scass.

Yes she's at school, she'll be 5 next month.

She is eating some bits, but a lot more fussy than usual, and turns her nose up at stuff which she normally would eat - especially sweet stuff which she normally scoffs. She normally eats all her packed lunch, but quite often over the past 2 weeks she hasn't been eating everything.

Today, she's had two pieces of buttered bread. A small bowl of tortilla chips, cucumber and carrot sticks. And just now had a small bowl of cereal.

To me, her poor eating habits and recent appetite is a warning sign, as well as her tiredness.

I don't think she has worms because I've checked her poo twice now.

The only other reason I can think of is that she's had covid, and is now feeling the after effects - a lot of kids in the school have it at the moment.

My partner think I'm losing the plot, but I'm very angry and stressed she's not taking this seriously. She has a horse, and whenever that horse starts playing up with food she gets worried and rings the vet, yet her own daughter is eating pretty poorly and she's not worried at all.

She told me earlier to take her to the doctor myself, and I said fine, I'm glad we're both on the same page. And she just shouted back 'no, it's for your own reassurance'.

Thing is, I took her to the doctors start of last week because she's had an awful eczema type rash around her mouth and chin/cheeks for 2 weeks which wasn't clearing up. My partner wasn't bothered because she's suffered from eczema a bit since a baby, however this wasn't clearing. The doc prescribed some antibiotic skin cream, and Epaderm (which is for eczema/dry skin/psoriasis) and it's improved now. So that shows I was right to take her in, and I'm not all mad.

I'm very, very worried she has something serious going on like a Leukemia or a gastro issue like Crohns that's affecting her appetite and making her tired.

[MrLurcher]

It's now 5pm, and she's sitting in front of the TV looking blank and knackered. This is NOT a healthy child AT ALL. I feel like my head is going to explode with this worry and stress about her.

[Scass]

Ok, back up because you’re getting hysterical and this is not helpful to anyone.

My daughter is watching her iPad and if I try and make her do ANYTHING else she will tell me how tired she is.
Your daughter is in reception which is exhausting for a little girl, especially as she’s so new to it.

If you take her to the doctor, what are you going to say? “My daughter doesn’t have a great appetite at the moment?” They will just give you a blank look and it will say far more about you than her.

Is she going to the toilet normally? Does she have a temperature? A tummy ache? A sore throat? Any aches or pains? Is she drinking well? Does she sleep ok? Without asking her these things - because that’s reassurance seeking for YOU - make some notes. Let her tell you if she’s feeling anything, don’t put words in her mouth.

After you take her to the doctor, I suggest you book an appointment for yourself and tell them what you’re doing. Tell them how you’re doing mentally and how your health anxiety is spiralling & you can’t manage it.

Please do this Mr L. I am not unsympathetic, but sometimes it’s time to ask for help from someone medically qualified.


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[MrLurcher]

She's not new to reception, she has been in full time school for almost a year now.

I would tell the doctor that yes, she is not eating great, but she's also more tired than usual.

She's going to the toilet normally yes - once a day, but has been a bit more constipated recently. Drinking and sleeping fine, yes. No tummy ache, but she said her belly hurts this morning and didn't eat breakfast - she has occasionally complained of tummy aches now and again for a while. She had a bit of a temperature last night, and we assumed covid like the eldest, but test was negative.

Unfortunately I do ask her a lot if her belly hurts, or if she's feeling ill. I know that's poor on my behalf, and I need to stop.

I would take her to the doctor, but my partner needs to come too because they know my history with HA and having already been in only last week about her facial rash, I'm worried they won't take me seriously.

I know I'm not doing mentally well, I cry every day about my dad still, I feel depressed to hell about life, I hate myself a lot. But this isn't about me, it's about my daughter who's clearly not right.

Just to update, she also has a temperature again tonight which would coincide with something like leukemia or crohns. Why won't my partner take this seriously????!!!!! This isn't bloody good at all.

[MrLurcher]

She's just been to the toilet and there was a whole bunch of undigested blueberries in it that she ate only lunchtime.