Hi all I’m feeling really down and negative today. Had a terrible night with insomnia and now thinking that the meds arent doing anything except giving me side effects (8 weeks on 20 mg citalopram)
im better than i was for the first month but i still think im worse than i was before i started it again. Didnt have this insomnia or breathlessness or crying all the time. i had one bad panic episode related to severe pain from my IBS but otherwise was just a bit down and edgy. i said to my husband this morning i should just come off them but he got angry with me. The doc i saw yesterday has anxiety herself and she has been on meds for 18 years. she said i should probably have tried something different this time as i had been on the cit a while. she also said its a lot harder to treat the second time
I tried not taking the lorazepam yesterday to see how id go without it. i actually surprised myself and wasnt too bad- bit edgy and anxious but ok and i just cracked on with the day but it all went to custard at about 8.30 in the evening when i guess i was tired. Back to being anxious and breathless and tears again. So frustrating as i hadnt cried for a few days and id had a better day up to that point. i know part of the problem is that i keep putting these expectations on myself and get really frustrated when i feel like ive failed. Psych is still really keen for me to go increase as he thinks i will need that to get better but im just so scared of getting the side effects back, particularly increased anxiety and the awful burning sensations i used to get.
just feeling pretty hopeless and dark - really sick of all the crying. Will this get better?