Wheel of Fortune Health Anxiety

[helenhoo]

Can anybody relate, number of worries at once or nothing or everything? I'm in therapy but we've yet to properly discuss distraction techniques in the two sessions so far. I seem to be incredibly jumpy at any body twinge and ache and currently worrying about cervical cancer and 'what if' I have pain when I have sex even though its not an issue. I had abnormal cells zapped off last Jan and clear check up in July but my anxiety is now trying to get me to worry about an issue that isn't even here.

[Carys]

I think you should wait until the therapist gets to the part that is going to help....cos we've been through all of this here for years with you. You know, if you read on here, that many people will relate. So, what about telling us some more about the therapist ?

[helenhoo]

We've discussed SMART goals and I've mentioned two I'd like to achieve. I said I'd like to not analyse every body twinge and establish when something is a genuine concern and when it's my anxiety. She said its OCD and Health Anxiety and to focus on one at a time so I chose the HA as that's the most concerning and consuming. I was honest with her about how it affects my work and personal life, often not focusing because my mind wants to go and check and prod one thing or another.

[Carys]

Well, that sounds like a good positive start - how do you feel about it ?

[helenhoo]

I feel good and I feel maybe that's why my anxiety is fighting back harder. She's asked why I worry about my health, I said maybe it's control?

[ankietyjoe]

my anxiety is now trying to get me to worry about an issue that isn't even here.

Try and look at this differently in the short term. Anxiety doesn't DO anything, it's a normal bodily process that feeds off stimulus. It reacts to danger and is autonomous, it can't make you worry about anything. It's your reaction and your thoughts that are the problem, and this is a good thing. It's good because it means there is something you can do about it (this is what the therapy should help you with).

Try and move away from the idea that anxiety is a malevolent and uncontrollable entity that has a will of it's own, it's not. It's like saying that your own sweat is causing you to feel hot, which is the wrong way around. The sweat is there because you're hot, it's not causing it. Similarly the anxiety is there because of your own habitual thought patterns, your anxiety is not causing the thought patterns.

[helenhoo]

That's a good point. So I'm so used to feeling anxious, my body is on autopilot?

[NotDeadYet]

I feel good and I feel maybe that's why my anxiety is fighting back harder.

This post actually brought a huge smile to my face this morning. This is real progress. You should be incredibly proud of yourself.

Best Wishes

[ErinKC]

I am so happy to hear about your therapy starting and you sound like you're already doing great! I agree with ankietyjoe. Your body has been producing so much adrenaline for so long that it will take time for it to settle down. Anxiety is a chemical reaction to a stimulus. People like us just react to smaller and smaller things over time as we become more and more hyper aware. You are EXCEPTIONALLY hyper aware of every sensation you feel. This is SO normal for someone with anxiety, especially health anxiety. As you work through things with your therapist your adrenaline levels will go down and you'll stop noticing every single sensation.

Also, therapy can help you figure out more of the basis for your anxiety. I think control is definitely a huge one. I also talked a lot with my therapist about a fear that if I didn't worry something bad would happen. I think that's a major trigger in health anxiety. So, as you start to let your guard down that instinct you've developed to attack every small thing will probably linger for a long time.

The biggest thing is to turn the "what ifs" into "so whats" ... instead of - what if this feeling means this terrible thing you can start to say - so what if such and such hurts? It takes time but it's so so possible!

Good luck moving forward with therapy!

Edit to add: Yes also to what you said - often in the beginning you'll have big waves of "normal" and then sudden set backs. This can be frustrating, but over time you will start to level off and have longer and more stable periods of feeling good until that becomes your norm!

[Carys]

I feel good and I feel maybe that's why my anxiety is fighting back harder.

Good, then stick on with it and really engage with the ideas you are given. Maybe - its become a habit for you, that way of thinking. Now its time to learn new ways to think, and new habits.

It was my deliberate intention of course to not reply to your original statement - that is the old way you would have come on here, asking about your worries about physical niggles. We've been there for years with you Rebecca, its been done so many times and got nowhere. You know the way your HA is, you know the way it is for others. Lets carry on talking about what things you are learning in this therapy process, the difficulties, the breaking of the habits. This won't be easy, don't expect it to be.