Swollen lymph nodes behind baby’s ears

[Fishmanpa]

Yeah when I had health anxiety I rushed my 7 year old to A&E because I thought his heart rate was too high after he'd just been swimming. 2 hours later and he was hooked up to an ECG, because of me. The Doctor had a swift word with me at the end, asking with some conviction if I could 'sort my sh1t' out. So I did.

Very profound AJ and so very relevant and spot on. My daughter suffers from depression and anxiety. Most of it was inherited from her mother as my ex suffers from depression and hoarding. That said, I'm also 100% sure that the separation and divorce from her mother when she was 5yo played a large part in exasperating her condition.

Kids are WAY more perceptive and subsequently influenced than we give them credit for.

Positive thoughts

[nhelen79]

I know about. I will say this though, what is your fear here, because something is driving your lymph node concern and has been since he was very young ? Does your baby already have annual bloods for a condition ?

Lymph nodes, blood count and moles scare me because I imagine the C words go with them. I’ve stop googling for years but the anxiety flares up more especially with kids. I’m afraid that since I discovered his nodes months back, I listened to his pediatrician and stopped checking. If it’s something bad now, it’s my fault for letting they grow in so many months till now. I understand it sounds very irrational but the thought it’s there.

[nhelen79]

My 5 year old just had an infection inside a lymph node and her node was 5cm! So, 0.5cm is nothing! Listen to the doctor.

Did it go down eventually? I heard that sometimes it stay.

[nhelen79]

Very profound AJ and so very relevant and spot on. My daughter suffers from depression and anxiety. Most of it was inherited from her mother as my ex suffers from depression and hoarding. That said, I'm also 100% sure that the separation and divorce from her mother when she was 5yo played a large part in exasperating her condition.

Kids are WAY more perceptive and subsequently influenced than we give them credit for.

Positive thoughts

Positive thoughts

Hi Fishmanpa, I got what you mean here. I don’t check my older daughter anymore now that she is 6 and pay attention. I don’t want her to get obsessed with everything on her body. So I keep myself calm whenever she complains of something. For my younger son though, I still get super anxious whenever I discover something new like yesterday.

[Fishmanpa]

Hi Fishmanpa, I got what you mean here. I don’t check my older daughter anymore now that she is 6 and pay attention. I don’t want her to get obsessed with everything on her body. So I keep myself calm whenever she complains of something. For my younger son though, I still get super anxious whenever I discover something new like yesterday.

I hear what you're saying as well but.... As an example, my ex and I were on rocky ground for a while prior to our separation. It was due to her depression and mental issues. There was no intimacy nor affection for quite some time. One day, our daughter asked us, "How come you and Mommy don't hug or kiss like other Mommys and Daddys?". We thought we were hiding things well but she picked up on it. We knew then we were really in trouble and I was able to convince her to go to marriage counseling. After a few sessions the therapist wanted to see us separately before we were in sessions together. She went for a few sessions and quit. I knew then it was over.

Just keep in mind, children are WAY more perceptive than we think and out actions and words have a profound impact on their lives. Don't get me wrong, there are positives too. One of the things I always taught my children is to do something in life you have a passion for. For me it was music. I never hit the jackpot but I made a decent living in the music industry and continue to do so part time to this day. My son always wanted to travel and see the world. He works for the airline and travels the world for free. My daughter loves little kids and she's a pre-school teacher. All I'm saying is mental issues can and do affect all those around us. If my ex had stuck out therapy and really tried to help herself, who knows what may have happened. But when I saw her give up on herself, I saw it as giving up on us.

Positive thoughts

[NancyW]

When my youngest son was just a few years old I noticed a string of lymph nodes on one side of his neck, I became obsessed to the point that I took a flashlight into his room at night to look at his neck. I started to dress him in turtle neck shirts so I was not gawking at his neck all day.

I took him to the dr.. she said they were raised due to some recent virus and they would go down in 4 weeks. Well that set the timer in my head...and they were not gone in 4 weeks.

I was sick inside. During a bath one morning he said mommy my neck feels hot like the stove. I felt like a was struck by lightning. I took him right in to the dr. Saw a dr I didnt particularly care for so I was not happy. Dr examined him and looked at me squarely... I know what you're thinking and it's not. His lymph nodes enlarged due to a virus, sometimes they go down and sonetimes they scar and never go away.

It was exactly what I needed to hear, he set me straight. Eventually they went down a bit but I can still see them today if my son turns his head a certain way.. he's 26 years old.and healthy as an ox.

[ErinKC]

Yes, it went down with antibiotics. I haven't felt it since, but the doctor did say that side may always be a bit larger than the other because of how much it stretched.

[nhelen79]

I went back and checked his appointment notes. I did bring him in for a red bump check behind his left ear in September. Her diagnosis at that time was just skin rash. He also has been through 9-month and 12- month physical checkups and his pediatrician never once mentioned to me that his nodes behind his ears (specially left ear) are swollen. I can’t remember if she ever checked them during the physical checkup anymore.

I’m so mad at myself for believing her. What if the spot behind his left ear has always been swollen and I trusted her and let it go for 3 months? What’s kind of a mom I am if I’m not able to protect my own son? :( she’s a pediatrician from Standford and I trusted her.

I wanted to run and take him in for CBC blood count today but I remember my own doctor suggested to wait for 1 more week for his last viral infection completely goes away. I’m afraid to look behind his ears now because I get panic when I still see the node. It looks the same as on Sat. It doesn’t seem to go down any smaller.

All the what-ifs

[nhelen79]

I hear what you're saying as well but....
Just keep in mind, children are WAY more perceptive than we think and out actions and words have a profound impact on their lives. Don't get me wrong, there are positives too. All I'm saying is mental issues can and do affect all those around us.

Positive thoughts

Fishmanpa, thank you for your advices. I really appreciate your words since I join this board years ago. I’ve been managing the health anxiety somewhat okay, better than in the past. I don’t run to doctors at every single thing that I notice on my kids. I actually am trying to follow their advices, but to be honest with you, the beast is like lurking around. It doesn’t go away. I tried therapy and didn’t work. I do talk it out with my husband and try to walk excercise. I don’t know what to do to completely erase it. When I was pregnant with my son and got pregnant-eclampsia, I was actually very calm although it could be a deadly condition for me.
After he was born, anxiety comes back

[nhelen79]

Dr examined him and looked at me squarely... I know what you're thinking and it's not. His lymph nodes enlarged due to a virus, sometimes they go down and sonetimes they scar and never go away.

It was exactly what I needed to hear, he set me straight. Eventually they went down a bit but I can still see them today if my son turns his head a certain way.. he's 26 years old.and healthy as an ox.

My timer has started. I think I would be uneasy until his blood tests are ok.