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Thread: Hi - My Health Anxiety - hope this helps you!

  1. #1

    Hi - My Health Anxiety - hope this helps you!

    Hi,

    Brand new to the site but been reading it for years - mostly to put my mind at rest for the plethora of imaginary illnesses Iíve had the last 6/7 years.

    I think my Health Anxiety first emerged when I became a father. I donít recall ever Ďbody botheringí before that and Iím sure it kicked in as my responsibility as a father kicked in and those fearful thoughts of contracting something that meant I wasnít around to see my child (now children - weíve had another since!) grow up.

    Iíve Ďhadí every illness going. Not really sure what the usual trigger is to have a HA attack. The latest one Iíve just, today, emerged from but this has felt like the worst. I injured my back on New Yearís Eve a simple muscle strain that took the thick end of 10 days to recover from, but when it didnít clear within 3 days I turned to google. Donít you just hate google? The actual worst source of symptom checking there is. It pointed to muscle strain - but of course, that wasnít good enough for me. I looked deeper and found it was symptom of testicular cancer I spent a good evening prodding and pocking my nether regions. Once Iíd satisfied myself it wasnít that I moved onto Prostate cancer, I read that it can spread to bones around your spine and hip and, OF COURSE, my back pain was radiating into my hip so it MUST be that. That faded and then things took a darker turn, I decided I had Motor Neurone disease as that makes muscles still...and they were...! So it MUST BE THAT ! I had images of my wife feeding me with a straw and my kids seeing their dad as a shadow of a man laid up in bed wasting away - I got into a real dark place for a few days. Insular, Constantly Googling, looking up statistics, trying to disprove those statistics - really horrible stuff. I should add that the last 5 months Iíve lost 2 stone through a great new diet and running 3 times a week. I started to put this down to cancer and not the fact Iíd worked really hard getting fit. Totally crazy.

    The MND stuff faded because I decided I could walk on my tip toes so therefore it canít be that, but as the back pain remained I continued to rely on my friend Dr Google to diagnose me. In the past week Iíve been fairly certain Iíve got Bowel Cancer - ignore the 12 males out of 100,000 stat in my favour (Iím 39 years old) ignoring the fact this was as likely as being involved in a fatal car accident and was adamant it was that. I had it abdominal pain (the back pain had disappeared and had the odd colicky discomfort in the stomach which now I put down purely fo worry) I had loose bowels (again, worry related) and I even (look away how) forensically inspecting my poo for traces of blood (none found - surprise surprise)

    Today I made a breakthrough and I can feel the spectre of HA leaving me until it bangs my door again later in the year. Anyone that can recommend anything I can do to avoid a revisit Iíd appreciate it, maybe itís just posting on here that might help my assimilate in my head that this is a mental health condition rather than any serious illness.

    Hope this helps people

    Ian

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    7,531

    Welcome to No More Panic!

    Hiya Villa07 and welcome to NMP

    Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and
    are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

    I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and
    support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way
    __________________
    Emmz xx

    nolite te basstardes carborundorum





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