So where to begin.....I'm currently 33yrs old and feel like I've been battling Generalised Anxiety and Health Anxiety most of my life.
It began with insomnia when I went to University when I was 18yrs old, that progressed to having panic attacks that I mistook for schizophrenia. And realised after googling that I have severe anxiety around sleeping. The insomnia cropped up again when I moved out of my parents house and cost me 2 weeks being signed off work as a result.
The next issue I faced many years later was horrible chest pains, pain in my left arm and in my jaw. A trip to A+E when this first began ended up with the doctors telling me it was an anxiety attack. This went away for a year and then came back again, which ended up with lots of doctors appts, blood tests and ECGs. Only again to be told its Anxiety and a mild Vitamin D defiency were the cause. Of course my anxiety constantly put this down to "AM I HAVING A HEART ATTACK" every single time.
However no matter how much I knew my chest pains were anxiety they would still come and go constantly.
Within 2019 my anxiety seemed to ramp up after I got married. And I developed horrible dizziness as the next anxiety symptom. Once again the doctors put this down to anxiety and it would come and go. My anxiety seemed to be really really bad when I went on my honeymoon, which frustrates me as I feel that I spent too long worrying I'd collapse or have a heart attack. I wonder if recently being promoted at work could have caused the anxiety to occur. I just don't seem to be able to handle any life changing events without being anxious.
After the honeymoon I got pregnant (very much planned and wanted). Of course this was a worrying time and my anxiety did what it normally does, but it almost felt under control. Maybe because I had a reason for any health symptoms I'd experience. Unfortunately I miscarried in December. I bled loads, ended up in A+E and needed a D&C. I then had really bad Vertigo afterwards for a few days, where I could barely stand.
After all of this I thought finally things would get better, but nope - 3 weeks ago I started getting weird pains in my feet. So of course I googled relentlessly and convinced myself I had MS. I had been experiencing a lot of spots in my vision when pregnant and weird afterimages, so this combined with the pains and pins and needles in my feet and hands just added to my fear I had MS. I went to the doctor and he wasn't convinced about MS he thought it was more down to a Vitamin deficiency from the blood loss. And after a blood test he found I had a slight iron deficiency. But as much as I try and convince myself that my weird symptoms are somewhere between iron deficiency and anxiety, I cant get rid of the niggle of MS in the back of my head.
I'm on iron supplements and I'm seeing an Optician on Saturday.
I will be going to see a therapist for CBT too.
I just can't seem to get a hold on my anxiety. I am so frickin fed up.
Reply With Quote
