Scared of checking breasts

[BrokenGirl]

I know this might sound silly to some people, but lately I'm getting very scared of checking my breasts. I do it every month, about a week after my period starts. So I'm due to do it tomorrow, and the truth is I'm absolutely terrified at the thought of it. I've had a few scares in the past, but thankfully everything turned out ok. It's now been nearly 11 months since my last mammogram.
The thought of checking them tomorrow is making me ill. I can't stop thinking about it and thinking the worst. And knowing I can't go running to my doctor doesn't help!

Has this ever happened to anyone here, that you just fill with dread in the few days before checking them?

[Leslie735]

I've gotten to this point myself. Especially now with the quarentine. :(

[Rebecca10]

Gosh I know what you mean. I’ve developed an obsession with checking every day for the past 2 years which isn’t healthy. Every time I’m in the shower I have an urge to check. I’ve never actually had a scare with my breasts to create this obsession but I’ve had ‘scares’ in the past such as a cyst in my armpit, a small lump in my leg, an abnormal smear, a skin blemish. Every single one of these worries turned out to be nothing but I know it’s what triggered all this health anxiety to the point I worry about everything!
I’m sorry I can’t help really I just want to let you know that you’re not alone but chances are everything will be fine! I keep thinking back to the past when I’d check every so often (not even monthly) without a care in the world and everything was always ok! I wish I could go back to being that way because I hate this constant worry. I asked my friends how often they check and most of them said every month (if that) and they’re never worried about it! I’d love to be so laid back and carefree!

[WiseMonkey]

Although I check mine monthly, I don't check them on a Friday or Saturday, it's usually a Sunday evening, so in case I did find something I could make an appointment the next day. This means I can have a stress free weekend

[BrokenGirl]

It's coming up to that time of the month again. I'm due to check my breasts next Thursday, I usually try to do it 7 or 8 days after my period starts.
As my anxiety is at an all time high, I've been very worried about it for the past week or so.
I stupidly gave a very quick check tonight after I got out of the shower and felt a lump on the right one, but a few more lumps around the same area felt similar but just not as big, and could feel similar lumps on the other breast too but not as big as the one I first felt. So I checked them around that area again, compared the 2 breasts and I think it's ok.
Checking them today is actually 4 days early and I never do that because they seem to be much more lumpy at that time of the month. I remember saying to myself before that I have to wait till day 7 or 8 to check them.
So I'm probably going to spend the next few days worrying about it again and trying to resist the awful urge to check them. I sometimes feel that my brain is telling me to check them early so I will find some sort of lump and force me to worry about that.
My mind is definitely my worst enemy at the moment, it's as if it isn't happy until it has me in a state about something.
Does anyone else ever feel like this??

[Lolalee1]

I was booked into hospital last week but because it’s elective surgery it has been postponed due to COVID I have implants and they need to be removed just can’t wait as one is leaking and making me feel unwell I was putting it all down to anxiety

[WiseMonkey]

I was booked into hospital last week but because it’s elective surgery it has been postponed due to COVID I have implants and they need to be removed just can’t wait as one is leaking and making me feel unwell I was putting it all down to anxiety

Oh no, hope you can get this surgery done soon xx

[Lolalee1]

The Mater Hospital has now started elective surgery so just waiting on a phone call,still confused as too why they called it elective surgery when I have poison leaking throughout my body?and I pay top dollar into Bupa
Thank you WM xx

[pulisa]

I hope you get a new date really soon, Lola..Horrible for you and certainly not "elective" surgery in your case.

[lyndau63]

I feel so sorry for all 9f you. I know just how you feel as I check mine multiple times a day and have done for 18 months. It's a long story which I won't bore you with but I have been going through hell. I have also been more frightened recently that, if I really did have a lump, no-one would have time to deal with it. Good luck Lola and everyone.