So, I've been thinking a lot about pregnancy,, generally because everyone around me seems to be going through it.

I'm 32 year old woman, and I'm haven't been in a relationship for years, I do have PCOS and I'm also Hypothyroid (I am on Eltroxin 50mcg for it though). Since August last year I've been taking Leonore 100/20mcg to regulate my periods.

I have had irregular periods since I was a teenager, but the last couple of years or so, they've been particularly irregular. Sometimes I wouldn't have a period for 3 months, then I'd have my period for 4 months straight, then sometimes I could have a normal period once a month for 2/3 months. Thankfully, the birth control has given me a period every month on time.

At this moment, I'm feeling very frightened that I may never have kids. I don't have the opportunity to meet someone right now in my life (nor in the pandemic situation either), and I'm scared because I'm 32, and my time is ticking away so to say. I'm also slightly overweight, by about a stone and a half, I do have really bad anxiety and depression, and in the current situation, I'm super stressed too.

Lots of things are plagueing my mind, and this is one that keeps niggling me. I think to myself, ''I could never afford all that fertility treatment, unless I saved for a few years, but how old would I be then? And with PCOS, how improbably will it be?'.

I'm feeling the pressure. I'm feeling very lost and confused, as I don't have a partner, I've never tried to get pregnant before, but I do have PCOS, and I see all this stuff online about the troubles and problems and how age makes it more and more harder. I don't know what to do, I feel panicky about my options and age.

Being 32 and probably the chances of meeting someone and having a baby in the next 2 years looks unlikely (especially with how long this quarantine may go on too), I'll be near 35 by then, and I read online that it says your fertility starts to decline from 32, and its better if you try before 35 to get pregnant, after that it becomes increasingly difficult.

It is just starting to feel overwhelming, because I would like children, and I don't want to disappoint my family if I can't have children, and their is a prejudice here in Ireland, as many women my age already have kids, and its a pressure things too.

I wouldn't care what age I was when I had a kid, whether it was 35 or 36 or 38, just as long as I knew I could have them, and I didn't feel so hopeless at the moment about it. It often has me sobbing with worry.

Will it be more difficult because I'm not in my 30's with PCOS? I don't want to feel like time is running out so quickly, that I may still have options available in the next few years. Sorry, I talk to no one about this, but just needed to talk about it as its eating me up inside.