Lump side of neck in the crevice of Jaw and below the ear

[phaven1]

Hey everyone,
I‘ve been suffering from HA since last year around this time.
25 year old guy here and for over a month, I’ve been in fear of a weird lump/lymph node on the side of my neck that I discovered randomly by massing my neck. It’s located in the area near my ear and side of jaw on the right in the crevice between both. It feels kind of firm and also it feels like it could be stuck to another muscle or something. Size is a pea and what scares me the most is that I could see it when I push skin on the side of my face up to the bone in my jaw. You can kind of also see it when I bend my neck in the light too. I DID go to a doc about it who brushed it off and told me there’s nothing to worry about and to keep checking on it just in case. She even said it’s too small/not worrisome enough to do a biopsy. However I guess I was expecting to at least get an ultrasound out of that appointment but with everything going on in the world I guess it wasn’t on the list. I do have a general physical next month but I just find myself worrying each day in fear that it’ll randomly get huge on me to wear I can see it without effort to. I don’t seem to have any other symptoms but just this lump. Has anyone ever had anything like this? I would love some insight on this.

Thank you!

[NotDeadYet]

phaven1,

I'm sorry your dealing with lymph node anxiety. I dealt with this for 2.5 years and it is awful. I worried incessantly about a lymph node that ended up being nothing at all.

It's really important to ground yourself in reality. The reality is that you went to a medically trained professional who not only told you that it was nothing to worry about but also gave you evidence by saying its too small to do anything with. The best advice I can give you is to stop checking it. That is going to take a lot of self control but you can do it. Have your doctor at your physical check it again if you're still worried and if you get the all clear, move on. Worrying about it "randomly getting huge" is doing you no good. Take a few deep breaths when you think about it and ground yourself in the reality that a doctor has already told you that you have nothing to worry about.

Best Wishes

[phaven1]

Thank you for the response! Specifically that last quote is something I really need to take in. I only started to worry about it again after prodding into it some more and feeling as though it’s kind of attached to a muscle when I push down on it. That part has me scared that it may be sinister. I’ve just been so depressed about it since last night.

[NotDeadYet]

I remember specifically where I was when I thought "What if I don't actually have cancer?" It was life changing. My behaviors and thought patterns didn't change immediately because they were so ingrained but it began me on the path to recovery. In terms of your thought pattern, "it's kind of attached to a muscle...that part has me scared it may be sinister." This is just a thought. I'm assuming you aren't a doctor so how could you truly know if it is sinister or not? Sure, you may have read things on Google but that doesn't mean those statements are true for you. Actually, you know they aren't because a medically trained doctor told you it's nothing to worry about.

Challenge your thinking. A good exercise when you start having the depressing thoughts you mentioned is to first, take 5 deep, slow breaths. Then tell yourself, "I'm having the thought that...." and then state the thought. For example, you have the thought that this lump is connected to muscle and thus must be sinister. Take a five deep breaths to ground yourself and then say, "I'm having the thought that this lump is connected to muscle and thus must be sinister." What you're doing in that exercise is separating an untrue thought from your brain thinking it's reality. You come to see that your thoughts are just thoughts and nothing more. This takes practice and will take time.

Best Wishes