Hi everyone,I am not feeling great at the moment and wanted to come on here where i know there are people that understand. I feel so alone with this anxiety that i sometimes feel there is no hope for me . I cant cope and i know i will never have a normal life. just a continual fight.I suffer from general and social phobia. I am just an anxious person. Yesterday i ahd to go to a meeting at my sons new school. It was my worst nightmare. A small, hot room with bright lights, and we had to mingle with other parents and get to know them. i had taken an atenolol before i went, so felt spacey and horrible. My husband said my pupils had dialated and i looked stoned. We had to listen to an hour and a half talk, and all i wanted to do was get out of there. I didnt concentrate on what they were saying and felt so anxoius. One of the mums i have just met came over to me and i went bright red and i couldnt hide it. The self loathing i have for myself is indescribable. I cant even manage a small thing like this.i came home and told my mum and she says that i will have to get used to it as there will be lots of things like this at my sons new school. I feel that i will let my son down.My husband and mum think i should learn to live with it or get over it. I can do neither. My dr has no answers and seems more concerned with blood pressur and cholestral than mental health issues.I am on atenolol at the moment which makes me feel bad, and i think gives me mood swings and depression. I have been on propanolol, and i think it made my hair fall out. Does anyone else feel like me and can recommend different meds or just advice. I have no one to talk to in the world who understands and dont know what to do next. I lay in bed last night and thought i had three options, live with it, lock myself away or jump of a cliff. I dont like any of them but i hate living in fear like this too.Sorry to go on,Thanks for listening,Josephine.x