Failed smear two years ago, now considering booking another one but need advice

[Lf93]

Hi,

I’m 26 , like many, I received the letter when I was 24.5 that I needed to go for my smear. Pretty much a month later I went ahead for my appointment. I expected it to be painful as sometimes intimacy with partners has been painful....and I’ve never really worked out whether it was a psychological or physical issue for me.

Either way I went ahead, and I didn’t feel too bad until I went in. My local doctors surgery isn’t known for being good. The first thing the doctor said to me was ‘have you had one before, I am going to warn you that it will hurt’. Her manner wasn’t exactly sensitive. I went ahead and I deliberately didn’t look up what happens during a smear until later, so I did not pay attention to what she was doing. All I can say is she didn’t get very far at all and it hurt and I started yelping a bit. She decided to quit, then proceeded to ask me if I was a virgin and then literally shut the door and ran off...

The procedure didn’t seem normal at all considering the fact that this is such an important thing to do. I left crying, felt like a massive baby and then realised I was even bleeding after despite her not even being able to get as near as taking a sample...so I am guessing she was quite heavy handed. I remember talking to my mum and she said it’s quite possible that seeing as it was an evening appointment that I was the last person and she just wanted to rush and get home. Either way, its not fair to have such bad manners that you pretty much put someone off going.

Two years later and I’m now reconsidering. But I am worried that the problem could be me and then it ends up happening again and I don’t know what to do.

When all this lockdown stuff eases and its possible to do so, I wanted to try a family planning clinic instead. Ive heard that people can have different speculum sizes...I have no idea what was used last time but its worth a try. I was also thinking of maybe taking a painkiller prior.

Has anyone else had this experience? I have only been sexually active since 22 years and from what I’ve read it would be quite unlucky to be having any issues 4-5 years down the line but I would still like that peace of mind, especially as I’m also on the pill and have been since i was 16.

[O_O]

Wow, your doctor sounds shit. Sorry you had that experience - it's not normal, and it's definitely their fault not yours!

So, first of all a smear shouldn't hurt much at all. It might feel a bit uncomfortable, and might bleed a little, but it shouldn't hurt. Perhaps it hurt you a bit more because you're a bit sensitive down there anyway, and it sounds as though the doctor was quite rough and used a speculum that was too big. If you had a kind, patient doctor that shouldn't have happened.

I think if you try again and make sure you go somewhere you feel comfortable it will be much better 🙂 if you explain to the doctor or nurse beforehand, they should be very gentle and careful and use a small speculum. And you could take a painkiller too just in case.

It really should go absolutely fine, and normally only lasts a minute or so. I'm sorry you had a bad experience the first time round.

[ErinKC]

That sounds awful, I'm so sorry you went through that! While pap smears are never comfortable, gyns should be trained to make them as non-painful as possible. I'll say that I've been seeing a gyn for nearly 20 years now and it took me until last year to find one who really treated my body with respect. It was like night and day!! The other three doctors I'd seen in the preceding years had been so quick and rough with the exams (they were all men, so that may have contributed). Then, I found my current doctor and she's magnificent. Never in my life did I think I'd leave a pelvic exam raving about how wonderful the experience was, but that's exactly what happens every time! She is so incredibly gentle and she really takes her time. I've dealt with fibroids for 15 years and she's the first doctor who took the time to really feel around for them, explain their positions, etc... Amazing. (Here I am raving about my pelvic exams again). This is all to say that there ARE doctors out there who will make this experience non-traumatic for you. It's a shame it's not easier to find them, but you should not be screaming in pain and should not be made to feel like a nuisance to your doctors.

I'm still not totally sure how specialists work in the UK. Can you choose your doctor specifically? If so, perhaps ask around for recommendations? I found my latest one by seeking recommendations from friends in my area.

[Lf93]

Have only just seen this, thank you everyone. I think knowing that this wasn’t a normal situation will help me to try again. I am thinking of going to a family planning clinic as I’m hoping they may be more used to doing smears, my doctors surgery is known to be terrible.