Exhausted & rundown with HA, chest & stomach issues

[Aleman200]

Hello folks,

I'm going through a really tough time right now and could just use some words of encouragement/support or just logic (A good slap on the wrist).

To explain, 2 weeks ago, my HA spiked when i had a panic attack, I went to A&E they told me everything is fine. Had an ECG/Chest X-Ray/Blood test. Nothing was found. All normal. Great. Cool.

Fast forward 2 days and I ended up in A&E again this time however, they were going to take out my appendix as I was taken there by my dad with incredible stomach pain to the point where I could not even move properly. At the time I was happy to finally realise the difference between and actual emergency condition and an anxiety one. God that pain was awful.

Since then however, my anxiety has become absolutely fixated on things pretty rare/ridiculous and even unrelated to that particular operation. The main one right now of course as most HAers have is their heart. I am terrified i have some form of coronary heart disease, and i'm waiting to keel over. The reasoning behind this? Well, recently i've been walking 30 minutes a day to recover from my operation, which is great, until about 20 minutes in when I start to get chest ache and a slight shortness of breath, If i stop walking it dies down, if i carry on it flares up again and goes on and off during the walk.

Now before my HA spiked, I had a rule of no googling at all, regardless of minor or major the illness was. But since I slipped mentally I ended up on a path I wish I hadn't. I googled pain during excercise and got Angina/Heart Disease etc, you know the drill. And of course this absolutely terrified me. I rang up my GP after 4 days of getting this while walking and he told me that at 29 years old, even overweight(Which i'm losing atm) it would be incredibly rare for a heart disease to manifest itself, even angina. I have no family history of heart problems (Except my grandad but he's like 90). I do feel tense alot during the day and my shoulders feel sore. Is it possible that all this ache and pain while exercising is nothing more than a combination of poor posture and muscular tension? The GP also mentioned that because I haven't really exercised well since lockdown began it could be my body adjusting to it. But a week seems a while for it to adjust. And of course, even though I've had ECG's i'm like "hur dur but what if they didnt pick up the angina". It's stupid. I know it is.

Secondly since then, my appetite has gone to shit. I wasn't eating after the operation which they said was normal but it's been 2 weeks and my appetite is still gone. Although, my GP prescribed me Citalopram 10mg which I have been taking for 7 days so I imagine that's a contributing factor. I also seem to get this really odd cramp on the left side of my stomach just under my ribs, could be IBS.

If you got this far, thank you . I don't know what else to do right now, I just had to vent my frustrations. I have my first therapy appointment next week and the citalopram is stacking up so, I'm not just sitting on my laurels and letting this rule my life entirely. But...any support would be appreciated. I'm so exhausted from the worry. I feel trapped in my own mind.

[Aleman200]

Maybe I'm just going mad.

I honestly wouldn't be surprised at this point.

[glassgirlw]

A week truly isn’t enough time to make up for being sedentary for a long time. It can take several weeks to build up momentum. I’m overweight as well and I get the same sensations you’re describing. I think you’ve been checked out at the hospital and you don’t have heart issues, maybe just stick with short walks and then extend the time as you feel you can? Try to take baby steps!

[Aleman200]

A week truly isn’t enough time to make up for being sedentary for a long time. It can take several weeks to build up momentum. I’m overweight as well and I get the same sensations you’re describing. I think you’ve been checked out at the hospital and you don’t have heart issues, maybe just stick with short walks and then extend the time as you feel you can? Try to take baby steps!

I do agree, I need to be kinder to myself.

My anxiety peaked today and (sigh) again I ended up in A&E, I had an ECG done came out perfectly normal. I had a blood test and they told me my D-Dimer was positive. Which sent me into a hell of a panic attack. I was like Oh god it's a clot, i'm going to die. The doctor flat out told me it can be positive for any number of reasons, from stress to infections. However, in my case, it's because 2 weeks ago I had surgery, and it's always positive after surgeries. This helped me but the guy was so nice he even sent me for a CT - Angiongram scan to check my lungs and heart vessels for clots. Guess what? They came back clear. They discharged me and told me to go home and relax.

With that in mind, I'm going to do my damn best to trust the doctors. The positive D-Dimer still scares me...but if the professionals aren't concerned. Then I shouldn't be either I guess.

[Redsmum]

I do agree, I need to be kinder to myself.

My anxiety peaked today and (sigh) again I ended up in A&E, I had an ECG done came out perfectly normal. I had a blood test and they told me my D-Dimer was positive. Which sent me into a hell of a panic attack. I was like Oh god it's a clot, i'm going to die. The doctor flat out told me it can be positive for any number of reasons, from stress to infections. However, in my case, it's because 2 weeks ago I had surgery, and it's always positive after surgeries. This helped me but the guy was so nice he even sent me for a CT - Angiongram scan to check my lungs and heart vessels for clots. Guess what? They came back clear. They discharged me and told me to go home and relax.

With that in mind, I'm going to do my damn best to trust the doctors. The positive D-Dimer still scares me...but if the professionals aren't concerned. Then I shouldn't be either I guess.

Hi Aleman, really sorry to hear of all your going through i can tell you’re going through it at the moment. Please trust the dr’s they know what their talking about & the tests are proof of this. Try to rest & relax in order to gain strength, do you have any hobbies at all that could distract you & get your mind of everything if only for a short while. Hope you feel better soon.

[Aleman200]

Hi Aleman, really sorry to hear of all your going through i can tell you’re going through it at the moment. Please trust the dr’s they know what their talking about & the tests are proof of this. Try to rest & relax in order to gain strength, do you have any hobbies at all that could distract you & get your mind of everything if only for a short while. Hope you feel better soon.

Thank you so much Redsmum, I appreciate you reading my rather drawn out story. I'm currently trying to re-engage with some hobbies to keep my mind busy. I know the DR's are right and I have no grounds to call them wrong, after all i'm not a trained professional who see's hundreds of thousands of people a week. I just need to keep a lid on my anxiety.

[Redsmum]

Thank you so much Redsmum, I appreciate you reading my rather drawn out story. I'm currently trying to re-engage with some hobbies to keep my mind busy. I know the DR's are right and I have no grounds to call them wrong, after all i'm not a trained professional who see's hundreds of thousands of people a week. I just need to keep a lid on my anxiety.

I know, its just so damn hard to keep our old enemy health anxiety at bay isn’t it, even though logically we know we shouldn’t go down that route our minds lead us down it. No matter how many times i tell myself not to get on the spiral & go down in the black hole i end up there anyway. Sorry not much help to you but i really do emphasise with you. Take care.

[Aleman200]

I know, its just so damn hard to keep our old enemy health anxiety at bay isn’t it, even though logically we know we shouldn’t go down that route our minds lead us down it. No matter how many times i tell myself not to get on the spiral & go down in the black hole i end up there anyway. Sorry not much help to you but i really do emphasise with you. Take care.

No no, thank you for replying anyway, just having someone re-affirm things is always helpful. I know the doctors checked me out and the D-dimer can be positive for a ton of things, I even rang my GP when i got home to inform her of the tests and she told me the d-dimer on it's own is absolutely nothing to worry about, it's when it's paired with swollen legs etc it can be worrisome. So i'm going to try and relax.

[Aleman200]

I'm really hoping the Citalopram kicks in soon because I feel so run down from all the worrying.

[NoraB]

At the time I was happy to finally realise the difference between and actual emergency condition and an anxiety one. God that pain was awful.

Been there. No time for thoughts. Pain takes over. Were you scared, by the way? I wasn't, funnily enough. My imaginary illnesses though? TERRYIFYING!!

i've been walking 30 minutes a day to recover from my operation, which is great, until about 20 minutes in when I start to get chest ache and a slight shortness of breath, If i stop walking it dies down, if i carry on it flares up again and goes on and off during the walk.

You've recently had an operation, cocker. This is your body's way of telling you to take it slow and easy. Shorten the time you're walking down to 20, or 15.

I googled pain during excercise and got Angina/Heart Disease etc, you know the drill. And of course this absolutely terrified me.

Ok, first off you know what happens when you consult Doctor Google. Nothing good will ever come of that, so slap wristy and all that..

Secondly, it seems that you have been inactive since lockdown? Dare I suggest that you're unfit? - as is half of the UK at the minute.

Secondly since then, my appetite has gone to shit. I wasn't eating after the operation which they said was normal but it's been 2 weeks and my appetite is still gone.

It would take a non-anxious person a while for their appetite to return after an op, but you have health anxiety too, and fear doesn't half bugger about with appetite. I lost two stone on the HA nervous breakdown diet. I can report that I've bunged most of it back on now I've stopped trying to convince myself I'm dying.

If you got this far, thank you . I don't know what else to do right now, I just had to vent my frustrations. I have my first therapy appointment next week and the citalopram is stacking up so, I'm not just sitting on my laurels and letting this rule my life entirely. But...any support would be appreciated. I'm so exhausted from the worry. I feel trapped in my own mind.

You're not as trapped as you think you are. You thought your way into this hole, and you can think your way out of it.

You're not mad. You're just as sane as I am.