DP/DR worst its ever been
I've been in a bad patch lately with anxiety, panics and depression as you will know from my last few threads. Touch wood, I am hoping that my anxiety will slowly start to come down now that I have told my family I need a break and time to get heal and running around like a headless chicken every day. The panics I had been having lately were 10/10 bad almost every single day for weeks and on top of that I was barely eating or sleeping those days too.
The worst thing for me right now is DP/DR. I've had it before after bad panics but never to this extent. I don't recognise myself in the mirror (though clearly I do, you know what I mean, its so hard to explain), when my husband took a pic of me while we were out for a walk the other day - when I looked at it, it looked bang on like the old happy me but I feel like I was someone else looking at the pic and not me looking at a pic of myself, I feel like I am on autopilot and getting no joy of of anything - I look at my cats and clap them and call them their wee nicknames but I feel like a robot doing it, I take pics of anywhere I go or things I do to try and prove to myself that I went because I feel as though I didn't go or do anything, my flat doesn't look right to me but then again neither does anywhere else inside or out, I can see and hear my loved ones but I don't 'feel' them - it feels like I am trapped in a bubble away from them, my vision seems blurry despite a perfect eye test recently etc. Its absolutely horrible.
I have been so close to going up to A&E and demanding they knock me out until this passes because I am struggling to deal with it so much at times. I have even called the local MH base just to make sure I wasn't going crazy. I know exactly what DP/DR is and that its my mind trying to protect me and after all the stress I have put my body through lately, I am trying to remain as calm as possible for it too but my god its hard isn't it? I am trying to get back into things I enjoy like gaming but I have zero interest and just feel like I am on autopilot or watching someone else do it.
Anyone have any tips on how to get though this or at least make it more managable?
Last edited by GingerFish; 17-09-20 at 11:04.
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C-PTSD (Complex Trauma), OCD, Panic Disorder, GAD
"Save your sympathy for someone else. I don't need it or want it. What you call a panic attack is merely a few normal chemicals that are temporarily out of place in my brain. It is of no significance whatsoever to me!"
"Recovery always lies ahead - however painful the moment"
"Recovery lies in the places and experiences you avoid"
Dr Claire Weekes.
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