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Thread: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

  1. #1
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    I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Hey friends. I'm feeling discouraged and disappointed today. This pandemic has really been a roller coaster of emotions for me, but disappointment is ruling the day today. Six years ago I started a freelance career after quitting my job following the birth of my daughter. I'm so incredibly proud of myself for building what became a very successful and lucrative writing job from absolutely nothing in the midst of paralyzing postpartum anxiety. For the past 2 years I've had an incredible client who I absolutely love. My daughter started Kindergarten last fall and I started law school. I felt alive again in a way I hadn't since becoming a mother. I was working 20 hours a week as a writer and killing it at law school while my daughter thrived in school. Then, Covid. In the past six months many areas of my life have suffered, but nothing more so than my work. I just didn't have the mental energy after everything else and it was giving me so much anxiety feeling like I was letting them down.

    Today I finally emailed them to say I couldn't take any work right now. I'm sure I'll be able to maintain contact and hopefully work with them again in the future, but I just feel a bit gutted. I'm back in law school and also homeschooling my 1st grader. While homeschooling is much better than the virtual school option and I value this time with my daughter, it's not something I ever wanted to be doing. Fall coming back around is also just making me feel sad about what's been lost. Last fall was such an incredible, exciting, and personally fulfilling time. Now, I'm taking Zoom classes 4 nights a week and being a first grade teacher. A good friend of mine moved to Utah and the last time I saw her was March 10. Right after the pandemic started, my daughter asked if she'd still be able to go trick or treating and I said - of course! it will be over by then. And, here we are.

    I'm just feeling kind of bogged down today.

  2. #2
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Yeah, I think many of us are feeling this way. We all have a level of personal frustration. For me, cause I'm Jewish, this weekend is our New Year, Rosh Hashanah. I watched the services on TV instead of getting together with my extended family. I miss being able to visit people, go out to eat and socialize, and watch a movie in a theatre.

    While I'm trying to concentrating on the perk of teaching virtually (as i'm an educator) like going to the bathroom more often and teaching in sweat pants, I provide more technical support than I do education. Also, many of my students are lazy and/or live in home environments not conducive to getting any school work done. In most of my classes, it's divided like this: 1/3 is caught up and doing what they're supposed to do, 1/3 has started on assignments, but are behind due to tech issues, and the last third signs into class and won't even open the assignments or watch any of the teaching videos. I call homes of absent kids and kids who are behind on work everyday. I'm available for tutoring 4 days a week after school. Parents have my mobile number. Some parents have yelled at me, asking me what do I expect them to do? Sorry, I thought they'd like to know their kid isn't doing any work.

    I don't know what to tell you Erin, but I feel your frustration. hang in there.
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  3. #3
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Thanks, Antsy! I know we're all going through all the stages of grief with this pandemic. And, I can't even imagine your personal frustrations as a teacher! I have many teacher friends who are really, really struggling. I opted to pull my daughter to homeschool, which was another heart wrenching decision because I adore her school, but we just had such trouble keeping up with the virtual in the spring and I knew I would struggle with the even longer days. I support people who choose homeschooling in regular times, but it was never something I wanted to do because I think a school setting is so fundamentally formative for kids. So, that makes me sad too! I can't wait until she can be back with her friends and a teacher who isn't me!

  4. #4
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Yeah, teaching is never easy, but the virtual teaching has everyone frustrated. I know parents don't want the double job of educating their kids, and so when I call them they want to take out their frustration on me, but I RECORD EVERYTHING that I'm teaching. All the kid has to do is watch the video. I just need the parents to yell at the kids to do it! That I can't do.

    Yes, I agree with you. Kids need that early socialization or most of them become very weird people. We already have kids socially stunted from too much screen time. I know this covid break is going to set some of the younger kids back. :/
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  5. #5
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    The beatings will continue until morale improves.

    Or, to put it another way, the Covid crisis will only be declared over when they've implemented all their agenda items.

  6. #6
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Wow, what a nice, positive, uplifting message, panicattacka *rolls eyes*
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  7. #7
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    You are obviously totally committed to your students, Vee and there must be such a lot of extra work for you..Dealing with difficult parents is just another pain which you definitely don't need!

    Erin, I'm so sorry your plans have been devastated by Covid and the fact that there appears to be no end in sight is depressing to say the least..but there WILL be an end to this and your daughter will benefit from being with you and from being homeschooled. She is lucky to have an intelligent and well educated mom who always has her best interests at heart. I'm sure you wish that more of your parents were like Erin, Vee?

  8. #8
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Yes, I do, P!
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  9. #9
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    This is normal to feel this way. Everybody expected this to be over by now but we're still here and back at square one.

    The world is going to have to live with the fact times have changed. Which is going to be tough, but I think for the foreseeable future we're going to be living at a distance from each other. I thought I'd be used to it being agoraphobic, but it's not. It's disrupting so many factors of life that I am not used to. Non of us are.

    I read that the hundreds of thousands (may be sensationalism) are facing eviction because yesterday the rule ended where people couldn't be evicted. Business are going under the buss left right and center.

    It's disastrous times, but for as long as we wake up to see another day we should rejoice that we have life today. Over 100,000 didn't wake up this morning.

    I like to watch an episode of Invisible People every morning to remind myself that a) there are beautiful people from all walks of life b) life could be different.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRRbCzZH_HY
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  10. #10
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    Re: I can't believe it's been 6 months... feeling discouraged.

    Quote Originally Posted by WiredIncorrectly View Post
    This is normal to feel this way. Everybody expected this to be over by now but we're still here and back at square one.

    The world is going to have to live with the fact times have changed. Which is going to be tough, but I think for the foreseeable future we're going to be living at a distance from each other. I thought I'd be used to it being agoraphobic, but it's not. It's disrupting so many factors of life that I am not used to. Non of us are.

    I read that the hundreds of thousands (may be sensationalism) are facing eviction because yesterday the rule ended where people couldn't be evicted. Business are going under the buss left right and center.

    It's disastrous times, but for as long as we wake up to see another day we should rejoice that we have life today. Over 100,000 didn't wake up this morning.

    I like to watch an episode of Invisible People every morning to remind myself that a) there are beautiful people from all walks of life b) life could be different.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRRbCzZH_HY
    My sentiments exactly.

    The only real way out of this mess is obviously the V-word!

    It's just such a crying shame that we have to keep pandering to and pussyfooting around the so-called antivaxxers and CTers. The serial AVers and CTers won't necessarily be forced kicking and screaming into being vaccinated. Of course their views and opinions theoretically matter, which obviously makes for democracy, but it's the fact that they continue to force their OTT extremist agendas on everyone, especially the gullible of our society.

    Trouble is, the genie has long escaped from the bottle, and seemingly almost anything goes these days, and the authorities are basically powerless to do anything about it.
    Last edited by Lencoboy; 22-09-20 at 16:50.

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