Please give me advice to get out of this horrific spiral.

[lilysmith123]

​I'm back aGAIN with my horrific bladder fears.

In July, I started getting urinary symptoms. I couldn't sleep one night and ended up feeling like I constantly needed the bathroom. I ended up panicking over this sensation, thinking it would never go away. I ended up in hospital for stomach pain, and my urine symptoms disappeared! Apart from after an ultrasound where they repeatedly pressed on my very full bladder and I struggled to empty it afterwards, I felt much better.

I struggled leaving the hospital, worried my symptoms would return when I was alone again. But I've been doing good except from one or two funny days. Therapy is helping too!
The other night, I started panicking thinking I was going to end up with a UTI after being with my partner. (which I've never had but constantly googling urine symptoms you know). Guess what? I had the symptoms back. The following day, I got my period (even though I have the IUD and haven't bled in 2 years)

I used to be able to go like 5 hours without feeling the urge for the bathroom. Now it feels like im back to square one again, I need to go like 1-2 hours after if even that long. Sometimes like an hour later, I feel the urge. It doesn't help right now I'm constipated thanks to codeine, so anytime I feel pressure around my bottom, I feel the urge to pee, so trying to convice myself it's my very full bowel pressing on my bladder!
I've convinced myself that I have interstitial cystitis, that I'm not completely emptying my bladder, that I am gonna end up having to get a catheter or something and this feeling won't ever go away and my life will be over.

Every night since I got home from hospital, I have to take a sleeping aid otherwise I am scared I won't be able to sleep since my anxiety is st its worst at night. I dont know what to do. I don't even know if I really need the bathroom so I'm holding for a bit longer to make sure. It's so confusing as I don't even know what my body really needs anymore
I have a urologist appointment in December and I was doing good until I got the appointment date through and started focusing on things again, then I spent like an hour googling UTIs and will my symptoms come back of I do xyz? And they did.

And now I am panicking and shaking over this. This has been the one HA symptom I havent been able to shake and I really just need a friend right now. My friends don't understand and everyone thinks I'm stupid for worrying like this, so I just need a friendly ear from you guys.

I've been working SO hard on therapy, doing my CBT activities but this is the one symptom I cannot shake and the one fear I always circle back to.

How can I possibly calm down? I feel like none of my usual things are working

[lilysmith123]

I have had the worst day ever. Spent the whole day and yesterday crying after talking to my therapist. They're adamant it's just simple hyper focusing on my bladder sensation, but I cannot believe that this burning etc only AFTER I pee and needing to go can be imagined by my anxiety? I feel so alone.

[glassgirlw]

In my opinion, a UTI is fairly common. Cranberry juice can help - don’t know if you have that over there. But even if you have a UTI it’s very easily sorted either with antibiotics or I’ve had suspected ones that end up just going on their own by staying super hydrated.

[lilysmith123]

Thanks. I've unfortunately tested negative over 10 times for a UTI so there is no infection causing it which worries me and never had been - frustrating! It lasted about 2 weeks in July, went away (although I was constantly thinking about it thanks HA) and it's back again! I do wonder if it could be anxiety, but it feels so physically real. I am terrible for catastrophizing so I honestly am sitting here like "oh god, It's something chronic with no treatment! I'll end up needing a catheter! My partner will leave me" and on and on it goes.

I was doing so well, but HA has came back to beat me up again!

[WiseMonkey]

It could be IC interstitial cystitis, I get this from time to time. IC is inflammation not infection and is considered an autoimmune condition.

You need to get your Dr to send you to a urologist. Don't drink anything acidic, like cranberry juice, citrus, coffee, tea or alcohol, just take heaps of water, no citrus fruit or drinks. Slippery Elm powder mixed with water is good and marshmallow capsules also anti-inflammatory meds like brufen, celecoxib etc.

[NoraB]

Hi Lily,

As with any other symptoms, the more you focus on something the worse it gets.

Lots of things can cause this issue down to what you drink and as a side effect of some meds. But anxiety is definitely playing a part here. Emptying the bladder is part of the stress response because you can't run or fight with a full bladder. You must recall anxious moments throughout your life where you've kept nipping to the loo with the sensation that you 'need' a wee? That's the fight or flight in action. It's anxiety. And the more we fear this symptom, the more stress hormones will be released and the more we will want to go for a wee.

I had an episode of this earlier this year. I couldn't stop going for a wee - which is very unlike me. Mine turned out to be due to inflammation in my pelvis area which was messing with the nerves. But I found that the more I focused on it, the more times I went to the loo. When I distracted myself, I didn't go so much - so anxiety of the symptom definitely influenced things.

Listen to your body and understand what it needs and what it doesn't. Leave out the stimulants, and don't make the mistake of drinking less water throughout the day. Stop liquids at about 6pm. See if these things help while you are waiting to see the urologist.

Don't Google. Don't go there. Unless it's to research anxiety or watch videos of cute cats - nothing good will come of it.