Re: How do you learn to live with a “shotty” node?
I have one (I think) behind my ear and one that was under my jaw. I noticed both in middle school I think (I'm almost 30 now) but have vague memories of noticing them when I was much younger. They were the kick off on my HA spiral. I was so afraid to say anything about them because I thought I'd be diagnosed with something awful. I also didn't want to upset my parents. But for years I was afraid I was going to die at any minute and I was afraid to do things like raise my head in case a friend noticed and freaked out (unrelated, but I had an incident where I had ringworm and one of my friends convinced me it was lyme disease and that I was going to die).
Then, when I was in college other life things happened that drove my anxiety into overdrive. Finally I said enough and I had my doctor take a look. Obviously having had them for almost 10 years at least at that point it could be assumed that they weren't harmful, but my doctor confirmed. It was a huge weight off my shoulders.
The one behind my ear is still there. The one under my jaw is gone.
Like everything else with anxiety, it's a process. There are times when you are flying high and times when you hit a low. I suppose that's what coping mechanisms are for.
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