Re: Any tips on how to stop "checking" yourself?
Originally Posted by
chloefaye
My brain has developed this horrible habit of constantly checking on if I feel anxious ect
I will feel completely fine no anxiety then my brain goes "wait..im feeling normal! no anxiety!" and then of course I remember and start to feel anxious again
When I had a mental breakdown, those rare few seconds when I felt 'something' like normal triggered a full on panic attacks!
The thought is just so automatic and my body reacts with anxiety automatically. It's like my brain doesn't want me to feel normal!!
Has anyone got any tips for combating thoughts like these?
Your brain is hardwired for negativity. Studies have shown that this is from birth, not just learned behaviour.
Bottom line: it's about survival. It stems back to early man. It's all very scientific..
Anyway, while the dangers that we face nowadays differ greatly from our cave-dwelling ancestors, the 'mechanics' remain the same, and our brains respond to our imagined dangers as if they are real. This is why it's a lot harder to think positively than it is to think negatively, and this is also why millions of people tune into watching EastEnders every Christmas Day.
While you feel like shit (and I know because I've been there) your body is actually responding as it should. It's just that your fight or flight is constantly triggered because you are constantly having fearful thoughts. Your body is working very hard for you! You probably feel like you are about to die? Like you will collapse to the floor any second? I felt like that all the time, but I never, ever, hit the floor. I just didn't understand what was happening inside of me, and how my own thoughts were responsible. Then I heaped fear onto what is the normal physical response to stress and I totally allowed my imagination to take control of me..
But the day comes where you know you have to get back into the drivers seat if you want your life back. We've all seen the action movies? It's like that - ish. We do this by telling ourselves that we are going to get better, not that 'we will try, but'. How many times have I seen 'buts' on here? (leave it)
The 'but' is where HA has you firmly by the genitals. You have to be absolute in wanting to regain control, and willing to put the effort in and not to give up when 'at first we do not succeed'. For some people, it's just easier to stay where they are. For others, it's subconsciously (or even consciously) where they actually want to be because it serves them in some way. That wasn't me. I desperately wanted the out of that particular situation, so I right-hooked HA in the chops and climbed back into the drivers seat - like a sweaty Sandra Bullock (only I look nowt like her). Ok, it wasn't that fast. Or remotely Sandra Bullocky. It was a slow slog back to relative sanity (relative for me) but I find that re-framing HA (and making it look a div) helps me a lot - like little Kevin makes fools of the bad guys in Home Alone.
Just as the brain reacts to fear by releasing stress hormones - it reacts to positivity by releasing the happy hormones!
Bottom line: make that imagination work for you! (and the one thing all people with HA have, is a bloody good imagination!)
My tips for this are as follows..
1. Accept fearful thoughts for what they are, as in, just thoughts. They're not real.
2. Understand that your brain is wired to respond to these imaginary dangers as if they were real because it cannot tell the difference.
3. Don't try to force yourself not to have these thoughts - that will only make things worse. Let them in. Observe them. Don't react with fear.
4. Practice relaxation as much as possible - even if at first you can only manage a second or two. Expect it to be hard at first, unpleasant even. Keep doing it.
5. Accept that the physical sensations of anxiety are unpleasant, but they're not harmful in any way.
6. Learn to breathe properly so when your heart starts to race you can slow it down promptly - which turns off the ANS (autonomic nervous system) and triggers the PNS (parasympathetic nervous system).
7. Stay away from stimulants - body and mind.
8. Think of one thing to be thankful for each day - no matter how crap that day has been.
9. Accept the potential for illness, and the inevitability of death, as death will happen to every living thing on this planet. We're here now.
10. Laugh, because fear and laughter (genuine laughter, not manic laughter) cannot exist at the same time. Laughter releases feel good hormones. It's medicinal.
11. Dr Google is shite. AVOID! AVOID! AVOID!
12. It's OK to throw yourself onto your bed, beat your pillows up and say rude words. It's therapeutic but only if it's the exception, not the norm.
13. Understand that when you have anxiety, you are sensitised and hyper-focused. Your body will feel 'alien' to you and normal things can look 'abnormal'. This is just your mind playing tricks on you. This is what HA does..
14. This will pass. All things do. You'll be ok.
Hope some of this helps.
Last edited by NoraB; 04-01-21 at 09:41.
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