bone cancer worry

[beargirl43]

after some googling i think it’s erythema nodosum, and it could possibly be a sign of lymphoma which i have continuously worried about and now i am terrified

[Fishmanpa]

after some googling i think it’s erythema nodosum, and it could possibly be a sign of lymphoma which i have continuously worried about and now i am terrified

Go see a doctor and let us know what they say. "Told Ya So Gang" on standby....

FMP

[NoraB]

it started in summer 2019 literally a few months after someone i knew being diagnosed with cancer

There's the trigger for your HA.

i worry about losing people i love.

That's completely understandable, and human.

i think up until now it’s just been going back to worrying about lymphoma and tonsil cancer.

Cancer is the go-to disease with HA and it's always terminal. It certainly was with me..

Anxiety can produce literally hundreds of symptoms - many which mimic real disease symptoms. The difference is that cancer doesn't come and go. It grows and worsens until treated..

Most people underestimate how ill anxiety can make us feel, and these symptoms are mostly very real and very physical because it's all connected to the very real stress response. In 2019 something happened which forced you to consider your own mortality. In most people, this will won't be a problem because they won't dwell on it. For those who are anxiety-prone, they will dwell on it. They worry it will happen to them. They trigger the stress hormones and they start to get symptoms, and they don't understand the stress response, so they make the connection that these very normal symptoms equals disease, but every test they have comes back clear - bloods, X-Rays, MRIs, and they are reassured for a while until the next symptom, and then it's onto a new disease..

i don’t want this to lead my life, i dread getting older knowing i’m more at risk for certain cancers, and i will no longer have my age to convince me i am fine (except for some cancers more common in children)

Cancer is the price we pay for the way we live today. All we can do is to try and live as healthily as we can, but, even then, there are thousands (if not millions) of people who did everything right and still got cancer. Also, cancer isn't the death sentence it once was. I know a lot of people who've had cancer, but only two who've died from it. One was my dad, and one was my friend. I watched how she lived from diagnosis to her death and the emphasis is on 'lived'. She packed a lot of living into those last years, and left her family with some wonderful memories. For many people, having cancer 'wakes' them up and helps them to live, and some might say that it isn't the years that you're alive which matter, as much as what you do with those years. A person can live to be 100 years old and not have 'lived' whereas I've yet to see a children's hospice which isn't full of children who are laughing and making the absolute most out of every second of life. It's about perspective..

i want to be able to have something wrong with me and my first thought not be cancer.

Realistically, that's the negative bias - something which all humans have. It's normal to have these thoughts. What's not normal is to fixate and dwell on them, and for this to stop you from 'living'. What you're aiming for is to have these thoughts, but to observe them - as opposed to reacting with fear to them.

When you next have a 'cancer thought' - just take a second. Do nothing. Then take take a deep breath in, hold for a few seconds, then exhale for as long as is comfortable.

Then, observe.

What is your mind saying to you? Is this thought fact? Or is it your imagination?

Where is the evidence for the cancer claim?

If you have a symptom, ask yourself, 'Is there is a more rational explanation?' (as I showed you with the power walking after not using your muscles for so long)

Perspective. Look at the situation as if it was happening to somebody else. If this was a friend or a relative? What advice you give to them? Would you be advising them to worry themselves sick or Google their symptoms? Of course not. Show yourself the same care that you would show them.

Practice self-care and relaxation: be mindful of what your body and mind ingests throughout the day. Eat well, hydrate - don't use stimulants - like caffeine based drinks/foods and junk food in general. Your body is hyper-stimulated because of stress hormones. This isn't harmful, but it will take time for them to settle back down. All stimulants (body & mind) will just keep this going. Think of it like when you have a burn on your skin - you wouldn't put anything hot onto it would you? You would cool it down. You need to be thinking all things 'calm' and 'soothing' and once your body has settled down - then you can slowly introduce stimulants back in..

I was about 13 when I lost my fear of death due to a very profound paranormal experience. HA came back to kick me up the butt when I had my children, but then it was the fear of leaving them, and this was me until I was 47 when I'd had enough of living in fear..

Three years later, I am comfortable with death and dying. I have accepted that, while I have no control over when I die, I do get to choose how I live, and that's as much control as any of will ever have.

Illness doesn't stop people living.

Cancer doesn't stop people living.

It's our own thoughts which stop us from living.

If you haven't already, get some help with this. I don't know how old you are, but speak to your parents and explain that you need a bit of help right now. Or if you're old enough to see (or speak to) your GP by yourself, do so.

A few more things..

You obviously have a very good imagination, and if you are a 'visual' person - use this to your advantage and relax using imagery. Imagine a happy and safe place - somewhere you've been that made you feel very happy - and use it to balance out the negativity. Mine is a beach in Wales. I was 'there' this morning watching the sun come up. You can go to your happy place whenever you like.

Finally, when you are' having a panic' and you're feeling those unpleasant symptoms - remind yourself that this is actually your body doing what it's meant to do. It's just that your brain doesn't know the difference between actual danger and what's imagined - it will react in the same way.

You're absolutely fine BG. This is anxiety, and it can be overcome.