Need advice in beating breast HA

[BrokenGirl]

Thanks for responding ladies. As horrible as HA is, it's always some comfort to know that we are not alone.
That's what I love about this forum - people get it and understand what you're going through.


I haven't felt my breast or thought about it as much over the past few days. And that's very good for me. I'm hoping I can continue improving on this over the next few days/weeks and even months. I realise that my way of thinking is so wrong, almost warped at this stage, when it comes to my health. I'm desperate to start CBT but will probably have to wait another few months. I've also had to stop the latest medication I was trying due to the side effects - that's the way I seem to be with most anxiety meds, can't tolerate them. I'm so disappointed over it.


I really feel like I'm just hanging on by a thread at the moment, without meds and therapy. So thanks again for sharing all of your stories with me, it has helped a lot

[BrokenGirl]

I'm really struggling the last couple of days. I stupidly felt my breasts a few nights ago, thinking I wanted to challenge this HA and that I'll be ok with whatever I feel. How wrong was I!!!
There's a lump in my right breast that's really scaring me. It's around the area that they told me at the breast clinic before christmas that I have some cysts. I can feel a few other smaller lumps and I presume they are the cysts but I don't know if this one is. I don't really know what cysts feel like and I can't stop thinking the worst again. What do breast cysts actually feel like? I always assumed they were softish but this one I can feel is firm/hard, but not as hard as a rock either.
I rang the breast clinic last week to find out when my mammogram will be and she told me it will probably be a few months due to covid.
Should I ring my doctor about this? I've nearly done it a few times but managed to resist in the end. I hate giving it to HA but I'm so worried about this lump because it feels different and bigger to the rest of them.
Do I ring her or keep fighting it, which will probably mean a few months of misery?

[carriewriting]

Sorry to hear you are struggling with this Broken Girl. I have one breast that has a number of lumps and bumps and I regularly get freaked out when checking it. I saw my GP yesterday to get my mental health plan renewed and mentioned that I wasn't sure if I'd found something or not. We agreed I'd wait 2 weeks and if I was still worried about it I'd got back to see her. Thinking about this, I've realised I actually have no idea what this breast feels like normally, so when I go back I'm going to get her to examine me and then draw a picture of my breast and where the lumpy bits are. That way I can refer to it when I check it in the future, like a map of my breast. Maybe that would help you too?

[BrokenGirl]

Sorry to hear you are struggling with this Broken Girl. I have one breast that has a number of lumps and bumps and I regularly get freaked out when checking it. I saw my GP yesterday to get my mental health plan renewed and mentioned that I wasn't sure if I'd found something or not. We agreed I'd wait 2 weeks and if I was still worried about it I'd got back to see her. Thinking about this, I've realised I actually have no idea what this breast feels like normally, so when I go back I'm going to get her to examine me and then draw a picture of my breast and where the lumpy bits are. That way I can refer to it when I check it in the future, like a map of my breast. Maybe that would help you too?

That sounds like a good plan Carrie, drawing a picture/map and knowing where everything is. But I won't be able to do that because she told me at the clinic that I have a number of cysts and I will always have them. They will come and go. So those cyst lumps are going to change all the time with me.

But I got my mammogram appointment in the post today. It's next Monday. I'm feeling relieved and scared, which I'm sure a lot of people here can relate to. But I'm happy with myself that I didn't talk to the doctor over the past few weeks about it. It was tough going at times but still I managed it....

[BrokenGirl]

Just hoping somebody can help calm me a little.
I have my mammogram appointment for next Monday. But it's only been 9 months since the last one. Is it safe to have a mammogram 9 months apart? I don't know much about the radiation that they give out but that voice in my head is making me worry about it now. I'm trying to tell myself that if it was dangerous then they wouldn't give it to me, they'd make me wait another few months. Am I over reacting?

[pulisa]

I would ask the referring doctor if there is a clinical need for you to have another mammogram so soon after the last one. Especially if the last one was normal.

[Carys]

Well, look, lets be honest people do have them closer together than every 12 months - people with recurring cancers, or people who have cancer currently often have a couple close together. People with cancer have radiation therapy. Radiation risk is small from mammograms (especially compared to radiotherapy), but its still a risk,and thats something you take on board whenever having scans done. How often they are recommended varies by age group and country you live in - for example some countries do them yearly for women aged 50, some 2 yearly, some 3 yearly. I would question why your 'issue' can't be checked by ultrasound instead ?

[BrokenGirl]

I just looked at my appointment letter and it says you can only ring between 9am and 1pm. I'm really after cutting it fine here. If I could reschedule it for a few weeks away then it wouldn't be so bad.
I don't know who the referring doctor was as I don't have the referral letter I got before christmas for my breast clinic appointment. And I know these doctors are only in the clinics one or two days a week anyway, so the chances of getting it sorted that way are very slim now.
Should I just ring the mammogram department in the morning and get it rescheduled?
She told me before christmas that is wasn't urgent - if it was she said she would have sent me for the mammogram that day. And my last mammogram was normal.

[BrokenGirl]

Well, look, lets be honest people do have them closer together than every 12 months - people with recurring cancers, or people who have cancer currently often have a couple close together. People with cancer have radiation therapy. Radiation risk is small from mammograms (especially compared to radiotherapy), but its still a risk,and thats something you take on board whenever having scans done.

I only saw your response Carys after I posted my response to Pulisa. So am I over reacting, should I just go on Monday and get it over and done with? Or reschedule it?

[Carys]

Sorry, I've just edited and added to my reply further up.