Thanks, everyone, for the kind words.
What makes it diggicult for me is just the constant nature of these anxiety attacks. Not triggered by any situation, any object, etc just random adrenalin/panic waves. I always understood it that panic attacks happen and tten leave you alone a bit, with me they seem to be always here. That makes doing anything really difficult, and makes you feel like you're really going crazy. Have you all really had this? Constant panic rushes? I dont just meamn feelings of dread or that theres something wrong. But actual small panic/fear rushes every 7 minutes?