I'm still 'tuned'
I'm still 'tuned'
"Learning about" the contrast research sounds ominous...and definitely not part of any HA therapy?
Yeah, you're right Pulisa. Thanks for calling me out on it. I know I shouldn't have done it. The problem was it got stuck in my head because when the GP first mentioned about the MRI she started to say something about the contrast and then pulled herself up and said "but it's quite safe".
I had a bit of a reality check this morning wondering why I'm stressing about this contrast maybe being a problem down the track when I struggle to see myself surviving the multitude of health anxiety driven illnesses that I think will get me in the next 2 years anyway!
I guess it's a bit like last year when our city was smothered by toxic bushfire smoke for 2 days and I was freaking out about lung disease in the future. If it happens, it won't just be me. Millions of people around the world have had MRI with this contrast.
I'm a bit of a sucker for personality tests and recently did Strength Finders. It was no surprise to discover my top 2 were analytical and learner. My therapist noted that this is why health anxiety is so hard for me, because my natural inclination is for discovery and research in all areas of life. I'm trying to channel this into more mentally healthy lines of enquiry than health, but it's an uphill battle.
I've decided suck it up and have the MRI. It's not worth wasting anymore time worrying about this and I just have to give up control and trust my doctor.
I think the problem with health "research" is that you "discover" more than you bargain for! And you are not medically trained to interpret the information appropriately anyway.
It must be very challenging to undergo HA therapy whilst still having tests and procedures. Is your GP aware that you are having schema therapy?
My GP and my therapist have exchanged notes on me (I can only imagine!).
Schema therapy is about changing your beliefs and that can take a long time. That's why I still need to be doing my CBT when I start to spiral, but I struggle to remember to do it. I'm going to put up a note on my desk and put it in my calendar, because those exercises do help.
Hi friends, just checking in. No news really except that I've told my GP I'm not having the MRI. Yes, after a lot of soul searching I decided having the contrast without an actual medical reason wasn't something I wanted to do. I don't think my lumpy area has changed since I found it in February, so that seems a good sign. I'm supposed to wait until June to have my next mammogram and ultrasound, but I'd really like to get it over and done with. I can't quite wrap my head around why my GP is so unconcerned. It seems to go against everything you hear about getting breast lumps checked. But she's very thorough and usually orders tests at the drop of a hat so, hopefully all will be okay. I go from fatalistic to optimistic depending on the day.
I've been reading Stop Worrying, Start Living by Dale Carnegie and even though it's very old and quite sexist, there's a lot of great information and advice about managing anxiety. Staying busy, giving to others and not letting your mind stray beyond the present day are my key takeaways at the moment. Until next time
I'm really glad its working for you ! Some 25 years ago (during a hospital admission for mental health reasons), I took these statements above and applied them to my everyday life and it is that which I attribute the fact that HA became a mere nothingness, whereas before I was a dreadful debilitated sufferer.Staying busy, giving to others and not letting your mind stray beyond the present day
Hello, I'm back to close this thread. I had a mammogram and ultrasound last week that was normal. The lumpy area was found to be normal fibro glandular tissue.
I am now very glad I didn't go ahead with the MRI and have a map of what normal is for my breasts now when I do self exams.
I'm feeling more confident about managing my anxiety, but it takes work everyday.
That's very good news Carrie. I think it's important that you limit your medical tests now. Only agree to them if there is a clinical need and avoid doctors who order tests for reassurance purposes because they know you will willingly pay for them?
I’ve just read through this thread and I just want to comment and say how strongly you dealt with this. I’m just about to start some CBT therapy and I’m hoping I can become as strong as this
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