Bizarre punishments as children

[Lencoboy]

Did anyone on here ever get punished as children, at home, school or both, especially for doing something relatively trivial in the grand scheme of things, with something really bizarre, ludicrous and out of the ordinary?

I'm not intending to be voyeuristic nor perverted in any way, nor do I want to this thread to degenerate into endless 'kids today'-bashing matches and debates about corporal punishment not doing past generations any harm, etc, which of course is subjective and still very much a grey area. Also if possible please keep anything sexual out of this thread.

One of the strangest ones for me (at school) is an entire class (or sometimes even school) being punished over the misdemeanours of just one pupil, with every single pupil being put in detention or forced to miss break times, and even worse (especially before the 80s) every single pupil being caned/slippered just because of one child.

Lazy justice IMO.

[WiredIncorrectly]

I got a slap when I went too far with bad behavior. I got grounded in my bedroom for the 6 weeks holidays for accidentally smashing my bedroom window and lying about it. Police came out and everything to investigate and they figured out it was me. I wouldn't say that's out of the ordinary though. I was rascal. I set fire to my house when I was 6 and watched the fire burn in the kitchen. I ran upstairs to get more teddies to fuel the fire before realizing it took over the entire kitchen and I had to wake my mom. I got punished by parents, the school, the police and the fire brigade for that. I still didn't learn, weeks later I had this toy that had popup ducks when you pressed the buttons. I'd attach lit candles to their heads and press the button so they flew across the room. After that I never did mess with fire.

[Lencoboy]

I got a slap when I went too far with bad behavior. I got grounded in my bedroom for the 6 weeks holidays for accidentally smashing my bedroom window and lying about it. Police came out and everything to investigate and they figured out it was me. I wouldn't say that's out of the ordinary though. I was rascal. I set fire to my house when I was 6 and watched the fire burn in the kitchen. I ran upstairs to get more teddies to fuel the fire before realizing it took over the entire kitchen and I had to wake my mom. I got punished by parents, the school, the police and the fire brigade for that. I still didn't learn, weeks later I had this toy that had popup ducks when you pressed the buttons. I'd attach lit candles to their heads and press the button so they flew across the room. After that I never did mess with fire.

Sounds like you had a lot of issues as a kid. And was your ASD undiagnosed back then?

Shame you also ended up in the nick for a time later on.

Going back to whole-class/school punishments, I've always thought it was an extremely lazy idea, if not inhumane, though collective detentions are obviously the lesser of the two evils compared to collective canings, though the former is extremely inconvenient to those kids and their families who may have made special after-school arrangements, and the bad 'uns get wind of that and misbehave all the more as a more discreet form of bullying.

I've heard that some teachers still do the whole-class detention thing even today.

Honestly some never learn!

[Lencoboy]

I remember when I was about 4 my mom warned me that shop managers would take me into the back of the store and smack my bum really hard if I touched anything or misbehaved in said shops.

Probably would have been really embarrassing for the store manager to be expected to physically chastise misbehaving little kids coming into his premises and inadvertently be portrayed as a potential bogeyman unless he was some serial nonce case, which of course doesn't even bear thinking about!

Seriously, was there ever a time when store managers literally had the legal rights and powers to physically chastise naughty little kids on their premises when it was (and still is) really the responsibility of the parents to discipline their misbehaving kids?

It kind of backfired, as I went on to develop fears of the shops concerned, especially in case a big hulking (male) manager came bursting out of the back room in fits of rage about to snatch me into the back and brutalise me for even breathing on his premises!

[Pamplemousse]

I remember a particular metalwork teacher's favourite for misbehaviour was to make you stand with two big and heavy G-cramps, one in each hand; one held horizontally in front of you and one held horizontally to the side for five minutes. If you went off horizontal you had to do it for another five minutes.

[Lencoboy]

I remember a particular metalwork teacher's favourite for misbehaviour was to make you stand with two big and heavy G-cramps, one in each hand; one held horizontally in front of you and one held horizontally to the side for five minutes. If you went off horizontal you had to do it for another five minutes.

Evil barsteward!

Just imagine all the kerfuffle if a factory boss made his/her workers do that as a penalty for the slightest misdemeanour?

Everyone would down tools and walk out in a jiffy, especially the Bobby Grants of this world!!

Going back to schools, it does sound like many were often brutal and inhumane environments (particularly before the 90s) and you were fair game for ill-treatment if you had a disability, homosexual, BAME, or a combo of some or all.

[Lencoboy]

I remember my mom binning one of the records from my Fisher Price record player when I was about 3 1/2 as a punishment for me refusing to eat peas for dinner one night and I spat them all out back onto the plate!

The record in question was the dark blue one that contained 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' b/w 'Au Clair De La Lune'.

[Noivous]

My mother used to keep a wooden paddle from a broken paddle and rubber ball toy in the top drawer of an upright dresser in our kitchen. She would use it to keep us in line...which was not easy. We kids would often move it to one of the other drawers and it was hilarious to watch her going through them trying to find it. By the time it was found the whole ordeal was one big laugh fest. "No Ma, try the other drawer." Actually though my parents never used physical punishment on any of us kids. My dad did once to the oldest boy. He swore at my mom - the kid had it coming. But that was it.

[Lencoboy]

My mother used to keep a wooden paddle from a broken paddle and rubber ball toy in the top drawer of an upright dresser in our kitchen. She would use it to keep us in line...which was not easy. We kids would often move it to one of the other drawers and it was hilarious to watch her going through them trying to find it. By the time it was found the whole ordeal was one big laugh fest. "No Ma, try the other drawer." Actually though my parents never used physical punishment on any of us kids. My dad did once to the oldest boy. He swore at my mom - the kid had it coming. But that was it.

The being whacked with a wooden spoon thing was a stereotypical punishment dished out by Irish mothers, especially before the 90s. I think a few years back (in Ireland) there was a comedy-drama set in the 80s about a stereotypical dysfunctional Irish family with an irate chain-smoking, wooden spoon-happy mother, and a chronic alcoholic, wife-beater of a father.

I came across it at random on YouTube a few months ago, and it was dead cringeworthy!!

Without sounding too prejudiced against Irish people, and trying not to tar them all with the same brush, I suppose kids being whacked with wooden spoons by their parents as a punishment was also a thing in England, Scotland and Wales.

[Noivous]

You ever catch Monty Pythons British birth vs Irish birth lenso? Absolutely hilarious. The Irish mom drops the baby in the kitchen while making dinner and never skips a beat 🤣. Of course there's about 15 kids in the kitchen with her already lol.