Hi again, this is mostly going to be a mix of a vent post with some reassurance needed

I’ve had issues with constipation/diarrhea off and on over the years, mostly due to lactose intolerance but also some suspected IBS. I’ve experienced blood when wiping before, usually lasting a couple days and only noticed with a bowel movement.

Last night, I had a very very painful bowel movement that felt like it was sort of cutting me. I know, TMI I had a decent amount of blood when wiping, almost like as if I had a period. I got a little anxious seeing it, but as I’ve experienced it before I figured I had a tear. I experienced a lot of pain when sitting, and when I had another bowel movement later in the night I noticed some blood at the end of the stool. I freaked out more about this, but tried to sleep it off.

Today, my first movement I have noticed more blood. It seems to be on the outside of the stool, and isn’t a very dark red. There was less blood on the paper, but I noticed more segments of blood in my stool. I’m trying not to panic, but the OCD is kicking in a lot to the point I’m afraid to go to the bathroom again.

Now for the venting. I always seek out threads on NMP first, as I know this is the place to go when my anxiety is bad and I do feel the need to look anything up. However, I made the mistake of forgetting to add the “site:nomorepanic” to google, and ended up finding, first thing, a reddit post about someone only a few years older than me having cancer. It’s so frustrating google shows results like that front page!! I know it’s good advice to seek out a doctor if it persists, but it makes me panic so much more when I see these rare situations and immediately think I could be that one in a million.
Just feeling really anxious right now.