Palpable Lymph Node in Neck - How normal is this?

[NotDeadYet]

When you say moveable... in what sense?...I feel like I should've just dropped this a long time ago after seeing two doctors who weren't concerned.

One way to drop it TSMC223 is to resist asking questions like this. You're only reassurance seeking and thus fueling the fire. Worrywart84 has laid out an excellent strategy. Try it out and see if it works for you.

[Worrywart84]

That’s a good point—if I tell you “I can roll it between my fingers about this much in every direction” then that may compel you to go touch your lymph node to see if it does that and if you feel like it doesn’t do it enough, you could cause another spiral. If your doctor (two doctors) told you it’s moveable and soft, then rest assured it is moveable and soft key word — rest (as in, rest your mind from this.)

[tsmc223]

Thank you all for being so patient with me. I know HA can be annoying with constant reassurance seeking, questions, disbelief, doubt, etc. Anyway - I guess if my doctors are unconcerned, I really shouldn't be. And I should really stop poking it and squeezing. (Sometimes I'll squeeze it between my nails and my skin will turn red. It's happened many times). I guess this really does aggravate them as many people have told me.

But seriously - I don't even remember how this lymph node anxiety started but once it did, I looked for them and sure enough found lymph nodes, nodes that I probably wouldn't have noticed if I weren't looking for them. And I keep telling myself that I am not a trained professional that should be doing my own lymph node examinations. It's interesting, I press hard on these things while my doctors gently pressed. I guess if something was so concerning, they would find something by gently pressing around - not poking and squeezing. I just genuinely hope this is nothing serious but it seems that there are hundreds of people that are going through something similar to me.

[tsmc223]

Ugh - I just can't stop worrying about it. I spent all day looking in the mirror and taking pictures of it. The one on the other side I've been poking now and I would say it feels similar but less raised. I feel like now its also more prominent after poking that one. It's bilateral to the other one I was worried about. Now I can't stop poking both of them. This has been going on for FIVE weeks now and I just can't do this anymore. I know it's causing so much damage to the lymph nodes.

I haven't even gone more than a week without poking or playing with it; even just lightly touching it is bad.

I just wonder has this really been there before I even found it? Like how did I never notice it until now? I guess I never really touch my neck but ugh the fear just lingers and lingers despite me getting reassurance from doctors and multiple people on forums, I just can't shake the worry. Ugh help!

[Fishmanpa]

the fear just lingers and lingers despite me getting reassurance from doctors and multiple people on forums, I just can't shake the worry. Ugh help!

I'll said this to another member in a similar situation and I'll pose this to you.... In reality, how can we help? Reassurance from doctors and members is useless. You've gotten the most practical and useful help and that's seeing doctors and getting the all clear. I sense the desperation in your words but more words won't quell the fear or help you stop the obsessive self checking behavior I'm afraid

FMP

[tsmc223]

I'll said this to another member in a similar situation and I'll pose this to you.... In reality, how can we help? Reassurance from doctors and members is useless. You've gotten the most practical and useful help and that's seeing doctors and getting the all clear. I sense the desperation in your words but more words won't quell the fear or help you stop the obsessive self checking behavior I'm afraid

FMP

I understand - I've seen the doctors and despite knowing I shouldn't be performing my own lymph node examinations, I still do. Also, I've been poking at it again which I know is just so bad for it. I think this is like week 5 of me poking at it and I just know I made it more slightly raised. I'm sure 25+ days of poking at it constantly will be very bad for it. I can't stop checking in the mirror to see if it grows and then seeing a tiny tiny part of it freaks me out - idk if it's my anxiety making me see things or not but I just really really need to stop poking at it. My hands have been on my neck 24/7.

It's just like... how did I notice this NOW? How have I never noticed before or even how long as it actually been there? Ugh.

[Fishmanpa]

I understand

Do you really? There's nothing wrong yet you continue this behavior. It's blatantly bad for you but you persist. If you truly understood, you would be making a concerted effort to stop and/or seek real life professional help. How does posting truly help you if you can't help yourself?

FMP

[tsmc223]

Do you really? There's nothing wrong yet you continue this behavior. It's blatantly bad for you but you persist. If you truly understood, you would be making a concerted effort to stop and/or seek real life professional help. How does posting truly help you if you can't help yourself?

FMP

I guess posting gives me constant reassurance. To know that there are others out there who can also feel their lymph nodes. It's actually scary how the mind works. Sometimes my lymph node looks HUGE when look in the mirror when I'm worrying but then sometimes, I can't see it at all.

[Fishmanpa]

I guess posting gives me constant reassurance.

Let's be real.... Posting here or elsewhere, you'll get reassurance. But is it really helping you? I say NO as you're constantly posting looking for the magic words that don't exist. I've seen this over and over and over for years and the bottom line is, unless you take personal responsibility and address your issues in real life, the pattern will just continue and you'll just become another serial poster on the anxiety websites

Positive thoughts

[tsmc223]

Let's be real.... Posting here or elsewhere, you'll get reassurance. But is it really helping you? I say NO as you're constantly posting looking for the magic words that don't exist. I've seen this over and over and over for years and the bottom line is, unless you take personal responsibility and address your issues in real life, the pattern will just continue and you'll just become another serial poster on the anxiety websites

Positive thoughts

It does help sometimes but yeah you're right. I can't live on like this. I just have to take the advice of my doctors. I just wish I never found this lymph node - I wish I never anxiously poked around my neck. And now I feel it's more prominent because of poking. I haven't even gone more than 4 days without poking it.