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Thread: Just not ok

  1. #1

    Just not ok

    I think I just need to talk. I'm not doing OK. So, my HA has been pretty under control for a while....not gone but not constant. Anyway, I started running a couple of weeks ago. It's amazing for my mood and anxiety but haven't been able to do it for a long time due to quite a bad relapse in my eating disorder. Due to the risk of that with potential cardiac issues and exercise, my HA spiked a little. Then I got some blood tests done and the results were troubling so I'm waiting for a doctors appointment to follow up next week. Major HA spike. And then a few days ago I sustained some kind of injury in both feet/ankles after running either plantars fasciitis or peroneal tendonitis... I'm leaning on the latter. Another spike and the pain is horrific. I can barely walk, let alone run. I'm drowning in uni work, my skins had a major breakout a couple of months ago and won't clear up. My anxiety is so high right now, not just HA but just generally. I don't know what to do. My GP is off for some reason with no potential return date and he's usually pretty reassuring. I'm taking a break from therapy. I'm too anxious to take the anti depressants that have been sat in my draw for the last couple of months. The only upside is that I'm on annual leave from work this week.

    I'm not sure I need anything, I'm just spiraling a little to the point where I can't breathe deeply enough and I'm trying to remember that its just anxiety. So hard sometimes to rationalise my way through this. Sorry for the complaining.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Posts
    327

    Re: Just not ok

    I dont understand how you can be too anxious to take the medication your doctor prescribed you that will help your anxiety? Please dont think I am being horrible here, I genuinely dont understand.

    As for running make sure your running shoes arent causing you issues. The right running shoe can make all the difference.

    I have never had any experience with eating disorders so I wont comment because I know anything about it. I can only sympathise with you and if I can help you in some way let us know and I'll try.

    Sounds like everything is getting on top of you. Find a way to relax and take your mind off things.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    2,523

    Re: Just not ok

    either plantars fasciitis or peroneal tendonitis
    Get off Google. It's not helpful.

    It's understandable why you are anxious, but the worry you have over this isn't "normal". Hence why you've got anti depressants that you need to take. With your work leave you could start your medications as you have a week to get over any initial side effects (if any).

    It sounds like you're currently in the eye of the storm. It will pass, as it always does.

    Has your doctor told you to stop exercising? I assume he/she hasn't. Which means you're in no danger. Keep up with your fitness, it's very helpful as you know

    Good luck.
    __________________
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    2,523

    Re: Just not ok

    Quote Originally Posted by pav1984 View Post
    As for running make sure your running shoes arent causing you issues. The right running shoe can make all the difference.
    I forgot about this. Yeah 100% make sure you've got some good quality running shoes. I've ran in all sorts and the pain afterwards isn't worth it. I always go with with Asics trainers, they're so comfy on my feet.
    __________________
    The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

    “I would rather have questions that can't be answered than answers that can't be questioned.” - Richard Feynman

    ☪️️

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    16,747

    Re: Just not ok

    I appreciate how exercising and an ED is such a minefield, NessMonster. So difficult to get the balance right and not give in to the compulsions.

    I'm so sorry that you can't access your trusted GP. It's so hard to get a handle on the ED when anxiety is so high from many sources but you must protect your ED recovery at all costs. You sound as if you have made significant progress so don't allow yourself to get overwhelmed by anxiety because it will have such a negative impact on your ED x

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Posts
    327

    Re: Just not ok

    Quote Originally Posted by pav1984 View Post
    I dont understand how you can be too anxious to take the medication your doctor prescribed you that will help your anxiety? Please dont think I am being horrible here, I genuinely dont understand.
    My apologies, it didn't occur to me you have never taken them before. This would make sense.

    Nothing to stress about. I felt sick for, I think it was a couple of days and they took a few weeks to kick in. I dont find them addictive at all which was what I worried about.

    Other people may tell you different things but that was my experience.

    Just make sure that you find someone to talk to. If you dont want to tell people you know just message on here.

  7. #7

    Re: Just not ok

    Thank you for the replies.

    My anxiety around the meds is that I've had a few reactions in the past to various things so I'm always a little on edge. I've also always been too busy to potentially have a few days where I can do nothing in case of side effects (I'm aware it's an excuse). You're right though I am off and now would be as good a time as any.

    I definitely need new running shoes as I'm sure that's what's caused it. I tried to run through the pain a couple of days ago and that's was definitely a mistake. I've not seen a gp about it because I imagine they'll just say rest and stretch, both of which I'm trying to do. I also don't want to bother them too much as I have to go anyway next week about my blood tests.

    Thanks Pulisa...it felt like I'd found the balance and was able to exercise with it becoming compulsive. It was actually helping with the ED. Trying not to give into that completely on top of everything else.

    I'm still pretty anxious this morning but I got a bit sleep last night so feeling a little more resilient today.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    16,747

    Re: Just not ok

    If you feel mentally ready to start the meds and if you have time off this week I'd recommend starting with half the dose your GP has prescribed. I presume your BMI is on the low side so it makes sense to be cautious.

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